Digital Friendships That Actually Last | Hopeful Disasters

: There we go. Let's go. That's right. To nobody to kind. So this is, this is so much fun. This is so much fun. We're going to have a great time.

: I'm just going to welcome everybody to the part that will be sent out for the podcast now. So welcome in to the Gaming Outpost podcast for the church.digital.

: I'm hanging out in gaming spaces and I'm chatting with friends who are online bringing the light of Jesus wherever they are. I call them digital missionaries. They may not call themselves that, but if you are Christ, you are the light of the world in a dark place. I think that makes you a missionary.

: So we're going to be talking with Woofller 77 today. We've known each other at least, I want to say, three years. Yes. And then two years ago, we spent a lot of time chatting and supporting and encouraging one another offstream. And I know that you pray for me regularly on stream. I appreciate that so much. Every day. Oh man. Every day. You are a warrior every day on stream. Love you, man. Hey, love you too, man.

: Let me just see if there's anything in chat. I'm just seeing a whole bunch of hello. We got 16 beds at the volunteer center. You now sleep 102 sunshine. That is awesome. And then a few working or lurkers and workers. I love my lurkers. Well, on my channel, I got an emote for the lurkers to show love. I don't have one over here for the church digital yet. So I mean, what could be greater than lurkers? I know. Just hanging out, just with you. They don't have to say anything, just resting with you. It's the best. Oh, they just, they just, you're just hanging out together. That's what that is. So it's pretty fun.

: I see my camera's going to pixelation there again on you. Yeah, you lost your crispiness. Yeah, but that's all right. We spent 20 minutes to get that fixed and now it's a problem again. Well, that's all right. We'll just go. We got your essence. We can see the essence of black. Even if it isn't as crispy as we want it to be. That's all right.

: Why don't you just kind of start with how and where did you get into streaming? What was your method into it? Was it Twitch to start with? Was it other platforms? Did you start out by watching? When did you decide to go ahead and tell the story of how did you decide to be a platform streamer?

: Yeah. Yeah. It's been a wild ride and I know I've shared this a decent amount, but I just get to marvel at what God has done. I did not grow up in the gaming world really. I had a Nintendo 64 growing up, but that was the extent of my gaming. I did actually play a little bit of PC games. There was a game called Battle for Middle-earth 2 that I was 10th in the world at at one point. So I shouldn't say I have no gaming skill. I have gaming skill in one area. But yeah, I was very not really familiar with like most of the gaming world and what it kind of has become and grown to over the last 20, 25 years really.

: So in 2017 I got introduced to Twitch for the first time by a friend who was a gamer who grew up gaming. And at the same time as I was introduced to Twitch, I just kept hearing like these sermons over and over again from pastors who I really respected, trusted, loved, but over and over again they were saying things like, "Hey, we, there's this generation that has left the church and we need to pull them back into the church. So we need to have young adult ministry. We need to have topical preaching. We need to have better worship. Like, we need to design an experience that's going to draw people back in." And at the same time, you know, they're saying things like, "You know, young men, it's time for you to grow up and stop playing video games, get out of your parents' basement, and get a job, and be a man, and all these things." And not that I don't agree with all of those things. Those are all good things as we mature as men. But yeah, as I was hearing those things, I was like, "Well, what about all the people who are interested in those things that you just told to come back to our church when you're married?"

: People see through the garbage of like, "We're going to create this program to bring you in." It's like, no. So you know, I just had like all of that going on. At the same time, I'm introduced to Twitch. Again, Twitch is like this brand new world for me that I don't understand. I'm trying to understand. But my friend sent me and he goes, "Hey, check out this streamer on Twitch. He's playing, I think it was like WoW or it was playing League of Legends or something," and I was like, "You said a lot of things in that sentence that made no sense to me. What is a streamer? What is Twitch? Like, that doesn't sound good."

: So anyway, I went in and checked it out and I spent 30 minutes on this streamer's stream just watching and kind of taking it in and kind of looking around, exploring Twitch a little bit. And it was just the most horrifying 30 minutes of my life. Like I was so like, "This is just a deeply, deeply sad and broken place." And everybody the church is talking about, here they are. I found them. And what's up DJ? And you know, so I, in my heart, I was just like grieved because I saw what this generation was choosing to be discipled by. It was boys discipling boys. Boys who can shave discipling boys who can shave. And watching that and being like, "Man, my boys are going to want to be here in like 10 years. Oh, like, I was like, man, what are they going to find? They're going to find overly sexualized, overly gruesome, very crude, profane, just a sad, hopeless thing."

: And so I was like, in the midst of seeing all this, I was just like grieved in my spirit and I was like, "Man, somebody needs to do something about this." I literally said that out loud. I was like, "Somebody needs to do something about this." And the Holy Spirit in me, as the Holy Spirit tends to do, just started to gently press on me of like, "Well, you're somebody."

: Yeah. And I was like, "Not me. I'm not the somebody I was talking about. Like, I will pray for that person, but I have a job. I've got kids. I've got a wife to support. I don't have time. I'm not a gamer. I'm too old. I am way too old for this space."

: And but with each excuse that I made, I just felt the Holy Spirit reminding me of the end of the Great Commission, which was, "And I'll be with you." And it was just, "And I'll be with you. And I'll be with you," with each, with each two-year-old. Thank you for reminding me, Justin.

: And so, with all of that, yeah, I just I did what I always do when I don't know what to do, and I just called my wife and I said, "Hey, I truly believe God is calling us into digital missions, into this place to share the gospel online. And I don't know what that looks like or what that means, but you know, what are your thoughts? And I know you're not going to understand this." And she was like, "You're absolutely right. I have no idea what you're talking about." But she was like, "If you truly believe that we're called to do this, then we need to pray and then you need to obey."

: And I was like, "All right." So we started praying and I started just showing up. At the time, I was playing like this little mobile game on my phone because I have no gaming skill. I had no, I don't even have like a console or any game that, and so yeah, so it was just like a, yeah, it was just like a, we're going to show up and what started as just me proclaiming the gospel and trying to care for people has now grown into Hopeful Disasters, which is you know a really a digital mission field where we are proclaiming the gospel online and getting to share the gospel with the lost, trying to pull people out of these isolated places online into being known.

: You know, so many people, we have a world that is you are connected all day every day but nobody is known by anybody. Oh. And so trying to help facilitate that, grow into gospel-centered community and then really get people plugged into local churches where they are and combine the in-person with the online. So that's the whole story, man. There's so many details in that, but I think that's the crux of it.

: Oh, that's a great place to start. I'm going to just try a couple of things here to see if I can play with the camera. I've been looking and trying to see if there's a feature here. So I'm going to click off of include my camera. See if that helps anything on your side. Does that help or not? It does not. Okay. Okay. Okay. You know, I'm just toggling a few things. I got options on here. The other thing is I sent you in Discord what it has for my side for the URL. So maybe if you copied my URL, it would give you a better picture. You sent me that in Discord. Yeah, I just, I just, oh, you know what? I have to hit enter, don't I? Yeah. Like, why will it not go? Okay, enter it. Like, I swear I sent it. It's there. It should be now. There you go. I like Zach's perspective. If you lower his voice, it's like he's trying to hide his identity. That's awesome.

: And it may or may not work. I mean, what we had to do last time is totally exit and restart. I'm trying to figure a different workaround. So yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Let me try it. All right. Does it work? No. Oh, same thing. Still the same thing. Okay, we lost our crispiness. Okay. Hey, thanks so much for the follow. Okay, then I'm going to do what worked last time and I'm going to exit and restart the stream together and we'll see how long it goes and if it disappears, it disappears. So yeah, no worries. That was so awesome. We're going to do that again. Now you look extra crispy. Okay. Look at you. Well, I can see that you were still on my stream talking while I disappeared for I don't know how long. So no, you're great. All right. Yeah, we got a lot of people coming in the chat. It's pretty awesome, chat chatting with each other. Let's go.

: So just to back up in your story, you were feeling a call to the younger generation. And then some of that probably still a little bit of yours of, "Hey, we need to help them. We need to reach out to them." But then, yeah, not seeing the church take action. And then you get introduced to where they are and you're like, "Well, let's go to where they are."

: Yeah. Did you have a plan when you started other than, "I'll just go show up and see what happens?" What was your plan of, "Let me go live," or is it, "Let me go build connection with them, let me just go learn." What was your approach once you got there and said, "I'm going to hang out on Twitch?"

: Yeah. You know what? I had no plan. I had zero plan. In fact, even at the beginning of HD coming together, I was like, "God is calling us to create a gospel-centered community online," and I have no idea what that means. Like, I have no idea what that's going to look like and what that's going to happen with that. And so yeah, when I showed up online, I pressed go on my stream and I thought to myself, "Man, who is going to come want to come watch this terrible gamer play video games?" Because at that point...

: It was like there wasn't really just chatting, you know, in 2017. I mean, there was, but it was only for like the upper echelon of streamers.

: Uh, and most of us were like, you had to play a game or there was no audience for you. And so, I was like, "Yeah, I'll just I'll just I'll just show up." And it was just amazing.

: Like what I found is there was so many people who would come to me and just say like they would say things like Wolfer, you're my best friend.

: And they'd say things like, "I've never shared this with anybody before. You're the first person I've ever shared these things with." And I'm like, "I don't even know your name. I know you as a you're a username. Like I can't be the only person in your life." And then I started I had so many of these stories over and over and over again with people coming to me.

: I was like, "No, no, no. This is real. Like the there's a bunch of people here who are so isolated. They have no community at all." Um, and my heart for the isolated just grew, you know, like um and the empathy that I have, you know, I've I've shared with you many times to share with my on my stream all the time. But like my um my own experience with deep addiction to pornography early in my, you know, in my teens and in my 20s, like I I know what that feels like.

: And I feel like God in so many ways has used what the enemy would use for evil in my life and now has allowed it to be a source of fruitfulness to step into these areas where like I totally understand. I was there. I'm with you. I get it. And even though my um even though my experience isn't in the gaming world, what the the result of it in the isolation is absolutely the same thing.

: Um and so yeah, it's it's been just been just like let's show up and watch what God does. And God just keeps narrowing the focus as we go of like, oh, this is where this is your pocket. This is what I want you to work on. Um, you know, which is really cool. It's really cool to watch, you know, you talk about the hands and feet of the of the church, uh, and digital missions being part of that.

: Uh, and what each each, you know, even each organization within Twitch and who's trying to serve this has a different call, you know? It's like, no one's like, oh, we're just trying to do the same thing. It's like, no, everyone has their own heart that God has given them. Uh, and so it's pretty it's been it's been pretty amazing to watch how God has used so many different people uh in these spaces and and we've seen so much so much movement of the spirit. It's just amazing to watch.

: Oh, it definitely definitely is. I'm going to try one more thing because I'm saying I'm going bad again before uh we should just like every five minutes do after every question after every question I'll I'll switch cameras and see if see if it gets better or worse.

: Yeah, totally, man. You're you're you're great. I'm I'm so so so good. Well, I'll just send I'll send you a copy of the VOD afterwards that you can share that'll that'll look good.

: Yeah, perfect. It won't it won't be your styling, but you'll you'll be able to share it. I can't Yeah, that's totally fine. Just apologies on that.

: Like I like I was saying is uh I got up this morning and my software for running my Elgato camera and my Elgato Stream Deck were gone off of my computer. They they disappeared. Don't I didn't do anything. They just they were gone. The the uh the link was just a little box on the screen and says the shortcut this goes to doesn't exist.

: And what? Yeah. So, I was I was able to reinstall uh Stream Deck, but uh Wow. I can't reinstall the Elgato Cam. It gives me a a thing that says, "Oh, well, this thing is missing to install it." Well, great.

: Then then uh uninstall. Oh, that won't uninstall because the thing is missing to uninstall it. Repair. No, the thing is missing to to repair.

: Um like, you know, that just kind of is like where some of these people are in their lives, too. There's a thing that's missing and like I have no knowledge and expertise how to fix what's wrong with my camera. Uh I I have none. I had tried for like three hours today and I thought it was working and that was all a false facade that looked like I was good for a while and now it just it's just disappeared.

: Uh, you know, there is there is a very real reality of the enemy using technology issues to try to take good and make evil. Uh, and it's just awesome to look at like cuz that happened with us on a stream like uh it was a week ago. We were doing a fundraiser for Hope Con and it took we had to like try to start it start the stream like five times and it wouldn't it wouldn't start and finally I was like we're gonna pray. Yeah. And we prayed and then it actually started. We're like thank you Lord. You know it's like that was so awesome.

: So yeah like I'm that it will not impact me. We we're so good man. We can't our joy can't be robbed stolen affected. We're so good. We're so good, man. So, yeah. I guess just saying it's it's just it is it is kind of like an analogy though for people who are online.

: Totally. Of 100%. That like on my side, I look really good. On your side, I don't look so good. You can see me differently than I can see myself cuz cuz it looks everything that's operational looks right. And then and then my community, I look good. But from your community, I don't look good. Uh, so there like there's a really cool analogy there.

: Uh, that's pretty good. Yeah. This this is this is the uh the 20 plus years of pastoral skills and take something and make it a sermon illustration. You know, it's it just happens live on the spot, everybody. That's really good, man. But hey, oh, go ahead. Let me pray before you do that.

: Let me just pray for you. I love Let me pray right now. Um, heavenly father, I just want to thank you so much for today. What an unbelievable blessing the gift of life is that you have given us. Um, and I just want to thank you so much for the gift of your son, Jesus, the Holy Spirit in us that works, corrects, guides, shapes us, and molds us, sanctifies our hearts to make us more like you.

: Um and Lord, I'm just so so thankful um for the love that you have for us despite us, despite our uh open rebellion against you, Lord. How you love us and pursue us and um you are just so good. Uh Lord, I just want to pray um for everybody who is in chat here.

: Um that this time would just be glorifying to you. Um Lord, that this would be a restful time. um that uh your name would be magnified, glorified, honored among all things um as it should be. Not for the glory of me or flat cap or the church digital or HD or any of those things. Um these things are all fleeting.

: Um what remains is is your glory, Lord. Uh and what we do in your name. And so I just pray that you would be magnified. Um, and Lord, I just want to I just want to lift up Flat Cap's um camera situation right now. Um, Lord, it is just a a detail.

: Um, and we I trust that you are working all things all things for our good and your glory. Um, for those of us who put our faith and trust in you. Um and so with that being said, you ask us to bring our requests before you. Um whether they are big things or details of our lives.

: And so um Lord, I ask that you you fix what is broken. Um Lord, that you would bring clarity um again, not for our glory, um but for yours, that there wouldn't be a distraction um from what needs to be shared today. Uh we ask this um knowing that you are so good and you are for us in all things and that um even this can be used um for our good and your glory.

: Um, so we trust you with whatever the outcome, but we ask you uh in your name, by your power, that you would um yeah, bring uh a fix and and prevent the enemy from trying to derail um what could be used for um for your glory. Lord, you're so good. We love you. I pray that you would bring more more people to know you today on Twitch. Bring renewal. um that lives would be restored, that isolation would be broken, that sin would be brought to the light, that freedom would be experienced.

: Lord, in your name, you are so good. We love you in Jesus precious name. Amen. Amen. Amen. Thank you, man. Yeah, dude. Let's go, man.

: Yeah, let's go. Let's go. Since since you've already mentioned it a couple times ra and and this is one of the things that like I am not a linear podcast like questionnaire like it's what's the next thing that I want to ask and we'll jump forward we'll jump backward uh but you've mentioned hope hopeful disasters and I know that that has been a a thing on your heart the last two years so we're jumping forward and maybe it's a little further than that but the process of refining what that is and moving forward tell me the catalyst for you feeling the call to gather streamers together to create that community. How did it create itself and draw people into that? And then so let's just start with the the coming together of it and then we'll get into more details later of where you're at and what you're looking to do.

: Yeah. You know, I when when it all kind of started it it was back in 2017. No, sorry. 20 2021 2017 was when I started. 2021 was when HD started and it came from um it came from a uh I I spent a week at a men's kind of retreat getaway.

: Uh, it was called Trinity Encounter in Montana. And it's basically this giant this giant hundreds of acres farm in uh in Montana where um a I think it was like 10 of us men came uh with the intent of like we're going to spend like six hours a day in solitude with God. M and so we're just going to be away in nature with the word of God in prayer and just like with the idea of like refreshing our lives, you know, refreshing, focusing, getting getting our eyes back focused on Jesus.

: And so I went there and at the time like I I had gotten to the point where I was streaming maybe like once a week maybe like so my audience was still kind of going but it wasn't really. Um, and uh, it it was in the middle of nowhere, Justin. I don't know. I don't even remember. But, uh, but it was um, yeah, it was it was one of those things where like one of the first days I just felt this pressing of the Holy Spirit of like, no, I'm not done with you here. Uh, because I was kind of like, hey, is it time? you know, this has been kind of cool and it's been a cool evangelistic opportunity, but like what what you know, is it time for me to move on now?

: I'm about to have my third kid. Um, you know, like life is busy. I'm working at this time at this point full-time at Amazon. My team, um, you know, I was a sales manager there. My team was growing to like 25 30 people. And I'm like, I just don't have a lot of like spare moments.

: And so I was kind of, you know, kind of thinking like, oh, okay, I'm God's taking me elsewhere. That season was like super amazing, but like I'm going elsewhere. And as I was just like sitting and reflecting and praying, I just felt like God was like, "No, there is I have you here for a reason." And not only do I have you here, I have more for you here.

: And so I'm like like you've only touched the surface of what I actually have for you. Um the first five, four or five years was really like a missionary going out and learning learning the language and learning the you know the customs of you know of a place.

: And so, yeah, so I I'm I'm praying and um you know, it was funny like I I'm kind of like discussing with the the leaders there um who are now like really good mentors of of mine, which I I just love. Um but uh you know, just discussing like what God might be doing and how he might be leading and and and one of the things that they you know, just said was like, "Hey, write down a list of of names. just write down a list of names of people that you want to connect with um and just start you know like just really really start um you know start having conversations around this if you feel God's calling you into it.

: And I was like, okay, that's that's an easy first step. Um, I called my wife and you know, at that point like I'm feeling the Holy Spirit moving and pushing me in this direction.

: So I call my wife and I'm like, I'm quitting my job on Monday, you know, and she's like, hey, like hold your horses. Yeah.

: Yeah. Yeah. Hold your horses. And like, yeah. Uh, and and that journey we'll talk about too of like, you know, how God has taken me over the last five years really.

: Um, but one of the names, the very first name that I put on that list is was James. Um, James who is your pal Shifty.

: Uh, he was the first Christian streamer that I met on Twitch. Um, and was just a great friend of mine. Um, but he and I hadn't talked for like over a year at that point.

: Uh, again, just you know, you have young kids and you know, he lives states away, so you know, it was just one of those things.

: Um, but I I wrote his name down and the uh, that night out of the blue, for no reason at all, I got a text from James being like, "I don't know why, but I felt like God was telling me to talk to you today." And I was like, it had been a year. It had been a year plus since we had reached out. And for me, it was like such a confirmation. I was like, okay, God, God really is has something for me.

: Uh, the spirit is moving and I got to I got to trust it. So um, yeah, we we jumped in and um, at that point like I I you know, called James and I was like, "Here's what I feel like God's laying on my heart.

: I feel like he is laying for us to to try to create 24 hours of gospel-centered content on Twitch. Um, since then that mission has shifted a little bit.

: I don't think we've ever really abandoned that, but I think the focus now is more 24 hours of gospel-centered community online. Um, and I I'm we're getting closer every day with those things.

: Um, but yeah, what what started with just us, we we um had I flew out, he and his wife, and we spent a weekend just the four of us.

: So, uh, me and James and our wives, wife, there she is. Um, and we were just um, yeah, we were just, you know, just laying what God had put on our hearts for this community and just kind of building something, but it was all just loose ideas, right?

: Like what would it look like for us to to be in this space and and drive more people to Jesus? And um, and so what kind of came was like all right, we're going to build this community.

: We're going to we're going to like start actively praying that God would bring us um, you know, likeminded streamers uh, to share the gospel and we're going to just go.

: And so we just the two of us just started streaming. Yeah. James used to stream back in the day and he would stream like every three, you know, like Monday, Wednesday, Friday.

: I'd do like Tuesday, Thursday, something. And like we were just kind of like, you know, just trying to be more consistent in the space and just trying to have conversations.

: And the the crazy thing that happened is as we were praying, it was like we just kept getting introduced to more and more streamers that were like-minded with us.

: Um, and and like I one of the things that I like think is is so is so important to understand like what is your motivation for streaming?

: Um, because I think like people come in all the time and they're like, "Oh, I'm thinking of streaming." I'm like, "Great. Just like be really clear about what you want to do and like what you're trying to create." Because I think being a like having the desire of being a full-time streamer where you're like, I make money being a streamer online is fantastic and you happen to be a Christian, great. Like, awesome. Like, there's such a need for that.

: Like, full-time streamer. Um, but there's a huge difference between that and someone whose focus is sharing the gospel online, right? Like that there's a huge difference.

: And again, not not one's not better than the other. They are just totally different. Um, and so God just like kept bringing these people to us that were like we are here to share the gospel.

: Like we don't we don't really care if we make any money or if our audience grows or for the glory of our own channels.

: Like I don't care about any of that. Like I'm never running subathons for myself which there's again there's nothing wrong with a subathon. Like I want to make that so clear.

: That's great. Like praise God. Like and if you more streamers sharing the gospel online is a good thing. But like for me I was like I was like God just bring like-minded people that are are about drawing people to you.

: And God just kept bringing these people over and over again that I would go to their stream and I'm like this stream feels like my stream you know like oh yeah this how like I just like I go to Zelda stream and I'm like your stream feels like my stream.

: Like I go to your stream and I feel that same way. I'm like you're here to share the gospel and as people you know people are subbing and giving and all that and it's like great but that's that's a byproduct.

: That's not like the focus. Um, and so God started just assembling this like crazy amazing team of people and we just started seeing like hey we're going to step in.

: We're going to provide this community and then we're going to allow God to shape how and shape and mold who we are within this community.

: And we saw that there were so many people in isolation. So many people who were either brand new believers or not believers at all who were interested in exploring faith that they're like they we have they have no semblance of what it looks like to have daily disciplines in their lives, right?

: They have no semblance of what it looks like to be in the word of God or to be in prayer. Um, and then and so we're like, well, we're gonna have Bible studies and we're gonna we're gonna have a new believers Bible study and then we're going to have Bible studies that are more for um, people who want to grow and mature in their faith. Um, and then we're going to just pray, you know, like every day we're going to pray through every single request that we get within our Discord.

: Like we're going to pray. We're going to be intentional about it. Um, and then as we were praying and as we were doing these things, it was like, hey, there is a need that so many people are bringing to us that they are struggling with pornography addiction.

: And I'm like, praise God that they're coming forth. God is bringing this garbage to the light. That is part of my story. I can speak into this.

: So many of the leaders can speak into this. And so it was like, let's start a group for men, you know, and like I God's leading us to this group.

: And what? Praise God. What started as just like an idea of mine, like God took that and was like, "Yeah, your little idea was just like a a seed of what I had for you." And now we got a group that has like 70 guys who are pursuing purity in faith.

: Um, and and pursuing Jesus. Like my what I talk about all the time within Fight for Freedom is like our my goal is not for you to just clean up your act and stop looking at pornography.

: My my goal is for you to be a mature man of God. How do I help you to be a mature man of God?

: And a byproduct of that is growing in purity. But it's not the other way around. We're not trying to grow in purity so that we can, you know, somehow like I I used to think and this is why I frame it this way.

: Like I used to think when I was growing up if I could just clean up pornography I would be perfect. Like there was a thought in my mind like if I just if if I just clean this up then I my life would be like I would be perfect and the reality is the more that I was free from that the more that I started to see no I am a disaster in everything every area of my life.

: There's not one area that I don't look at and say, "God, I need more sanctification in my life." Um, and so, hey, Fluffy, I see you and I would love to have a conversation with you.

: We would love to walk with you in that. You're not alone. Don't try to do it on your own. Absolutely. That sin specifically just thrives in isolation.

: Let's bring it to the light and proud of you. Like, that's hard to bring to the light. So, so proud of you for doing that and thank you.

: Yeah, if you want to if one of your mods wants to drop your your Discord for hopeful disasters should be able to click that and jump over.

: Yes. Uh, come join us would be great. Yeah. So that's that's kind of how and and what we um, what we found as we were going and and I you and I have talked about this before, but like what we found is like I I never um, and I I feel very convicted uh, on this. Um, we never desire to replace the local church in any way online like in no way. We desire to be the evangelistic arm of the local church that is sharing the gospel online.

: Um, and so being the evangelistic arm of the local church, like our goal is always like how do we mature people uh, and get them to the place where where they're able to to be in community where they are um, walk with the people in their community because I know there's a there's all sorts of reasons why people aren't in local church. Like all sorts of very valid reasons. Um, but but helping people heal and get to the place where they're ready to plug in again.

: Um, because I I truly believe online like I had a guy sorry, you're you said you're scattered with with podcast. I'm just a scattered person in general.

: But um, uh, but you did ask me to be here. So I am like you can't get what you can't you know flat cap's like oh man was this the right decision.

: Um, but uh, but I remember um, like right when we started uh, in uh, when we started in hopeful disasters there was somebody on um, like on on YouTube was it YouTube Twitter something?

: No, it was on uh, Facebook. A friend of mine posted something like I think they said uh, online community is not real community. Oh yeah, they posted that.

: Yeah. Um, and and like I was like, dang, dude. Like you have no idea. You have no idea what you're talking about, you know?

: And it wasn't like I I was like, he literally just has no no idea. But I'm like, don't post that then. Like, if you don't actually know.

: And what he was trying to say is like he he was trying to say, hey, don't go don't go to church and just watch your sermons online.

: Like that's what he was like trying to make a statement about. Like, hey, be a part of the church. Like, go to go to the building.

: Like it was in the middle of like kind of COVID and shutting down and opening back up. So, I knew what he was trying to say, but I was like, you have you you have no idea what you're talking about.

: But I there's a very real reality where I'm like there like I believe that online community is so important, so vital and yet I think it's a shadow in my mind of all that God has for us in in community, right?

: Like we have online community and then we have in-person community and I'm like both are so good. Both are so good. Both are so valuable.

: Um, and and so yeah, I I it was like it was a wild it was a wild kind of experience for me. And you know, like being you understand this, you like so many people here understand this like we we deal with the reality of um, the disrespect that that the foundational church has for people uh, stepping into places they don't understand. Uh, and and we deal with that disrespect all day every day. Yeah. The the I think some of the the difference is the church sometimes is a uh, a late adopter on things.

: Yeah. And so uh, online dating, nobody would argue that you can't meet your meet a spouse online dating and develop a real relationship and and then get married.

: But that's still their mentality of online relationships is online dating. So that the genuine purpose is one of you moves to where the other one lives or you both move some new place.

: That's their only thought processes. It's a means to get you in person. Um, that's the only way that they see it as viable. That everything that led up to that wasn't real relationship. It wasn't real community. It wasn't real.

: Um, the problem is, uh, in the rest of the world, those people that are under 20 don't have this bifurcation of what is online and what is in person. There is no distinction for them of real and unreal because they're both realities of their life.

: And they good use of bifurcation as well.

: Oh, well, thank you. Thank you. I was, I was sorry to cut you back. Keep going.

: Yeah, I'll go back to the thought instead of commenting on that further. Uh, the, uh, the reality is if my lens that I'm looking at the world is a lens that doesn't reflect the world, I have dirty lenses or scratch lenses or old lenses. My prescription has changed because the world has changed, but I'm holding on to my old prescription to look at it through the lenses I got when I showed up. And the world is not the same as when I showed up. Uh, it's a whole lot different.

: Yeah, and it is, it is a whole lot different. And the, and the crazy thing is it's like, um, I'm in this world and I hardly understand it. Oh, there's like the way that people have grown up in this space and like all of it, and it comes back to though, like even just, just to step back. I just had another thought. No, I, I'm not a native to Twitch. I, I am in Twitch. I love the community in Twitch. I will never be native. Uh, this is this something that when, uh, I moved to South Dakota, my kids learned. They went to school in, uh, my youngest was elementary and then, uh, middle one was in middle school, oldest was in high school when we moved there.

: And, and my oldest in high school was, uh, had this experience of saying, "Hey, I have someone who I think is a best friend, but I will never, they will never consider me their best friend because I'm not from here. Their best friend is the person who's best friends since kindergarten, whose parents were best friends since kindergarten." And so I, I can be in the culture and I can be a part of it, but I, I'm always going to have that distance between me and someone who is a native born South Dakota. I'm not picking on South Dakota. I love my friends who are there. Um, uh, I spent, I spent several winters there. You're welcome to continue to live there. I've moved, I moved elsewhere.

: Um, but, but I think that there's a, there's a piece of that that I won't be a native, so I observe things that natives don't. I can, I can bring things from, from outside of that to, to engage with. Um, where I hope in community that I have a lot of friends who are native Twitch, like this is, this is not a foreign language to them. They like, what's really was funny is after I started doing this and, and I'd throw out words like sus, and my kids would go like, "Dad, you use that properly." You know, you're, you're impressed by bifurcation. My kids are impressed by the use of the word sus. So I'm impressed by the use of sus, man. You nailed it.

: Uh, I, I sound muffled. Okay, I, I can raise that up. You sound, uh, you sound pretty good. We'll see if that, I can, I can read that. So bad for me. Okay, it's a very sus of sus. Yes, yes, it's a very sus of sus. I just, you're right, I just said I used it. I didn't actually use it. You know, that was kind of sus how I used it, I guess. So, oh, so good. So funny.

: So, so, uh, to come back to, uh, hopeful disasters. Yeah, yeah, where are you at? What are you doing? How are you growing? How has that whole process been a good thing?

: Man, we are growing so fast we can't keep up. Um, and, and the most amazing thing is it is the growth is coming and it has basically nothing to do without evangelism on Twitch because like just because of schedule and life and everything, I'm me. I'm, I'm probably the only consistent streamer right now that we have. Um, Zelda is, is trying to get back into being consistent. Kyle was pretty consistent for a while, but he's now gotten a new job. Um, and so, and James has stopped streaming, and, and most of the people are now focused on discipleship in our community, right? Like if we have extra time, it's not going to drive more people to HD, it's going to care for the community that God has given us.

: Um, and so, yeah, it's, it's wild to think that how fast we've grown when, um, I left my job in January. Uh, so I was working, um, full-time at Amazon. Um, had an amazing job. Amazing job. I just like, just a little tidbit here, I loved my job. I, I love my team was going to be growing to like 50 to 75 people this year. Um, like it was, get, and I was grow, like I was everything the world would tell you like, "Oh, that this is good, like things are good." Um, I was just like, man, I was getting everything. And then I, I looked at HD at the time and it was like, "Oh, man, this is so much work and this is so hard and this is so fun and this is good," and my managers are great, and I was like, "I know I'm called here." And it was even more of an affirmation that it was what I was called to because I loved what I was doing. It wasn't like, "Oh, I'm running away from Amazon to go do this thing." It's like, "No, I love that. I like that is awesome. This is hard. This is where I'm supposed to go."

: And so, yeah, we jumped in in January. When I, when I made the decision that we were going to leave, um, our community was about 450 people in HD. Um, in six months, we've grown to almost 700 people. So we've, by, by, um, one year's time, we'll likely have at least doubled, if not more than that, um, within our community.

: Uh, and so like we, we're growing so fast. Like I talked about our accountability group. I love those men. Like they are, they are such faithful men. We now had to open, like before we just met on Mondays. Now we're on Monday, Wednesday, Fridays. We've got different Fight for Freedom groups running at different times throughout the day.

: Um, and so like we're growing fast. We just added like 15 volunteers, um, you know, into our, you know, either within our prayer team or within our greeting team. We have an amazing, some amazing greeters, um, amazing community engagement people, um, amazing leaders within our Fight for Freedom group. Um, we, we need more, honestly, like we need more.

: Um, and you know, it's, it's pretty amazing that God, God has provided so much for us. Um, and he has provided so much financially. Um, and yet he has provided us not so much financially that we do not need to rely on him every day. Um, which is the most amazing gift. We get to walk in, in a place that the world would say, "Oh, you're at a place of scarcity," and we get to watch God bring abundance in those situations. And it's just like, man, I like, I don't know how he does it, but he does.

: Um, and it's, and so, yeah, to, to your question, I, I would say, um, there's, there's a part of me within my heart that thinks like, what would have happened if I jumped in earlier, you know, like, would this have already started? And then another part of me is like, I'm so trusting in the sovereignty of God that this was the exact time frame that all of this needed to happen and take place. And so, yeah, all that to say, it is, it's going, God is doing amazing things. We have an amazing team. Uh, we have amazing volunteers who I consider part of our team. Um, and yeah, this, this year, last year, our HopeCon, uh, conference, we had about 25 people. Um, we're looking right now to be 40 to 50 people this year. We're going to be in, in Missouri, um, in October. And so, yeah, we're, it's just, um, it's just been amazing. God, God has done such amazing things. Um, and so, yeah, I think that answered all the pieces of your question.

: Well, it just causes more questions is what it causes. So, of course, of course. The, uh, and I know, cuz I, I know like maybe a year and a half ago, we were, we were talking about, is it time to step away? Is it time? Because you, you've gone through the process of, of creating hopeful disasters, and, and you are forming the team, and you're like, do I leave what I'm doing and do this full-time? And, and that is really one of those hard, uh, decisions, and, and you're right, there's, there is, there's so much that you can second guess. "Oh, should I go sooner or should I go later?" I, I'm not worried about those things. You discern where you are and you step forward on faith and then you move forward to the next step.

: Uh, I'm, I'm always really bad at the advice of, "What would you tell yourself 10 years ago?" Uh, be prepared. It's, it's going to be different 10 years from now. That's it. Hold tight. Like nothing useful. I'm not telling you anything, cuz you're not ready for it. Um, yeah. Right. It's kind of like my advice, like, "No, I'm like, 'No, I'm not telling you anything. I had to go through it. You're going to struggle through that, too, my friend.'" But yeah, the, the question really is, um, what were the key markers along the way of, "Hey, I, I affirmed this with my wife as we stepped into this. Uh, I talked with the board. I talked with the, the people on the team. They affirmed, yes, come January, it's full-on," and then what were the, I'll just go with that, and then the other is, where are you looking at for funding then, uh, as a piece of things, if you want to bring that in, all of it, or do that at the end? That's fine, either way.

: Yeah, yeah, let me start with the first parts of it. Um, so, uh, from the beginning, like I, like I told you, I'm, I'm one of those guys that I'm like, if I feel called or led in a direction, I'm, we're going, right? Like, we're, I don't mean I'm not a, like, analysis paralysis by analysis kind of guy. I'm just like, we go and we trust and we watch God open and close doors, and if we go and God closes a door, we're like, "Oh, we, we'll change directions, you know." Um, and so when I felt the call that, uh, HD, um, is going to, uh, you know, we're going to create this thing, like initially, right away, I was like, "All right, I got to go. I got to go. God's calling me. I've been doing this for five years. Now it's time to step in and, and go." And I didn't know what going meant, right?

: Um, and my wise, beautiful wife, um, we had many conversations about this. Um, but she was very much so like, "I'm not opposed to you going. I'm just, we need, we don't have any of these steps laid out. We haven't talked to a board. We haven't raised money. We haven't done anything, and so we can't go yet." And I was like, "Man, why are you so practically wise?" You know, like, um, but from that point forward, because initially that caused friction because I'm always like, "Hey, if we're not responding to the call that God, oh, I'm, I don't want to be disobedient to God, right?" And at the same time, you know, "Husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel since they are heirs with you of the grace of life. So your prayers will not be hindered." I do not want my prayers hindered because of the way that I treat my wife.

: Um, and so I, um, so I changed my prayer that God would align my wife and I, and that when our hearts were aligned, that was a sign that we were going. Um, and that was such a change for me. Uh, and such an important step for me because I was like, God absolutely answered that prayer. Um, and like brought peace, and yet still I'm just always like, "Let's go, let's go, let's go, let's go." Um, but that was like the first step for me was, was coming back and saying, "This is what I want to do."

: Um, but then it was like, "Okay, what, what do we want HD to be, and what does that need to look like, and what do we want it to look like?" And so even within that process, like we wrestled with the, "Hey, am I just going to stay in my job and, and fund this thing like that?" And you and I talked about this too, of like, "Hey, this could be like, this would be great. I can continue to, to lead, run it, and I can pay for us to get missionaries on the field."

: And like in so many ways, I was like, "Oh, that's that's the best of both worlds, you know, like I get to keep my job. I get to like make good money. I get to be generous with the money that we're making. Um provide for this ministry. Like all of those things.

: Um but the more that Wler and I were praying and the more that we were seeing the issues that were coming up because I wasn't able to step in the way that I needed to, um we were aligned that it was like, "Oh, I need no I need to I need to jump in." Uh, and so midway last year, like it was multiple years of us being like, "What's the right time frame? What are we going to do?" And then in July of last year, Kristen came to me and was like, "Hey, I just want you to know like as I've been praying and discerning and thinking through this, I am ready for us whenever you I'm I'm ready to trust the spirit of God in you that he is leading us now." And whenever that is, whether that's today or in the next six months, like we are starting to move in that direction. And I'm I'm I know we are ready now. Yeah. Uh, and I was like, all right, and it became very real, you know, it was like a, "Oh, okay. All right, we're going." Um, and you know, one of the things that was so interesting in that in that process um is, uh, you know, the first hurdle that I had was fundraising, right?

: Right. Like what does that look like? I've never fundraised before. I have no problem like asking people for money. Like that's what my whole job was for 15 years in sales, right? Like that's that's not that wasn't a problem for me. It was just like I don't even understand the like logistics of this. Like how do we set these things up? Like what do we do? Um and so we we kind of like started by just like sending out mass notes to all my family and Kristen's family and our friends and just saying, "Pray for us. This is coming. We're doing this in January. This is what we're stepping into." And then we had a um an event at the um at the end of uh at the end of 2024 where we're like, "Hey, come here. We're going to actually share with you what God is doing, share with you what we're stepping into." Um which ended up being just like a massive massive success like people coming alongside us.

: I think one of the things that was so interesting even in our thought process like going back to your first question of like what were the milestones one of the things that we ran into when we decided that we were going to do this um I was like hey why don't we just sell everything we own move to North Dakota and retire you know like no one has to pay for us we can just live out our days right uh buy a great house our kids can have a great guard and then we we do our thing.

: Um and and again like I just the the wisdom of my wife when I brought her that idea, she's like I'm not opposed to that idea but like when I'm and we took like a week and prayed about it and she's like when I've prayed about it she's like we are preventing the people in our lives from getting to experience the gift of generosity. Yep. And stepping in with us and and not just being financially part of our story, but also being invested in our story, right? Where they are now praying for us, thinking about us, checking in on us. And that that has been one of the coolest things is as we've gone about this, they've um yeah, we've just had this team of people who have just come alongside us.

: I have to tell you the coolest story. You talk about benchmarks for us. Uh I think I I shared this with you, but um and I've shared this on stream a few times, but for those of you who are new or from um from the the church digital community um that we had our event uh our fundraising event at the beginning of December, the next day, so I had I the next day I preached at our church. So I'm part of our our preaching team at church, so I preach like every couple months. Um, and so I, uh, I had preached at our church and then the next week the elders of our church decided they wanted to do a fundraiser or like a special offering for Kristen and I. Um, and was just like pray like I didn't we didn't ask for that. They were just so generous to us. Um, and and so they uh, so they're announcing this and sharing what we do online. And um I had this this girl who I I didn't know, I didn't recognize from church. She came up to me and she's like, "Last week when you were preaching, I couldn't figure out where I knew you from." But she goes, she goes, "A year ago, I was deeply depressed, completely alone and isolated. I had left the church completely and I had no faith. I was just in the worst spot and I was doom scrolling on Tik Tok at the middle of the night on a Saturday and I came across your video sharing the gospel on Tik Tok and I was so convicted that I started watching all your videos. I started watching all this Christian Tik Tok and all of this um and and then Kristen and I are just sobbing because we're like what is this? And she's like, "Since then, I I was so convicted. I went to church the next day. I reave my life to to Jesus. I'm now living this life of hope and joy in him. And like I just happened to be at your church last Sunday when you were preaching." And I was like, "What? Like what is that?" Um, man.

: Yeah. And I just I just wild. Just so wild. Oh, so the uh the the weaving together that that God can do with stuff is is certainly amazing. And the other side of that, if she never reached out and engaged you on your TikTok or your other content, you would not know the impact. You would have no clue the impact that you had in her life. No idea. No idea. Yeah. As soon as you got the setup, I'm like, I know where this is going. I know where I know where this story is going. It's gonna be good. And that was that was the that was a week after we had like basically announced we're going to do this.

: Yeah. And like at any other time like if God God had allowed her to come a year later or 6 months earlier or at some other point like it was it was after we made the declaration we're going to go and God's like here's affirmation for you. This is the right thing like I am for you. I am here. Um and so I uh yeah it was a it was an absolutely wild thing but it was one of those benchmarks we always point back to when things get hard and when things get challenges and no God is with us. He hasn't stopped. He's not going to stop. And and so we can keep going in faith knowing he is he is with us in this.

: Oh yeah. Yeah, so you're you're getting into one of those stories. If if you're not uh seeing the chat, uh Samarella, it's not Samarella who's here. It's a friend of Samarella. Um so I don't know if you're updated on what's going on. Okay. So those that those that don't know, Samarella has come into several of our our communities, your community, my community, several other uh Christian streamers, and has just been rekindled in in her faith. U she's struggling through several different things. uh fighting cancer. She just had a surgery and now she's in a medical induced coma uh trying to fight and and help what's going on. And so we are just lifting up that dear friend. Um and and you were talking about my community, your community, other people's community. It's I don't think it's mine. It's the body of Christ community. And totally and and I have an expression of it that mirrors your expression of it that mirrors Zelda's expression of it that mirrors uh Ukulele for Worship's expression. It mirrors several others uh who are in the community uh or I should say who are in the body. Our communities mirror because we we we uh we resonate with one another.

: Um yeah, totally. Totally. I I think that is just Oh, sorry. Oh, I I was gonna say didn't mean to I was just going to say uh Samarella's friend is saying it's Lena. I couldn't remember if it was Lena. I knew it was started with a L. Thank you for sharing that. And I appreciate you so much, Lena, for letting the community know. This is actually one of those things that I'm trying to figure out how do we do a better job of it of I'm learning I'm earning your trust in a digital space. So, you were talking earlier of like, hey, I I know your your streamer name. That's great. I'm I'm not one that needs to know your your other name behind there. I'm good with always calling you a woofer. I I don't need to know anything else. Um I'm good with Samarella. I don't need to know, you know, if there's I'm good with Luces. I don't need to know anything. Um yeah, but what I want is real contact info so that if something in life happens like happened to Samarella, the community is not lost. We can reach out. someone is contacting us on behalf of her so that our our connection to one another in the body is not lost and we don't just suddenly have a person that uh just disappears and we don't know what happened especially as as we grow communities globally who aren't necessarily together in person. Uh totally we had tall skinny Kiwi here earlier today. I don't know if I've ever been on the same continent with him. Uh that uh you know, I mean that's that is like an amazing reality, you know, like how God is using these these tools and these things uh to allow us to share the gospel through. Like how crazy is this that we're on talking to people all over the world. We're talking to people in Scotland and people in uh the Netherlands and people in Hungary and and in New Zealand, you know, like how cool is that? Like, praise God. That's awesome. Love it. Oh, it's it's totally awesome. Yeah. Is there anything that we can do for Samarella? Um aside from just continued prayer and we've been praying, I mean, I've been praying for Samarella it feels like forever. Um and but you know aside from that uh um you know are there meals for family or anything that we can do please please let us know. Um we'd love to to care for her as well. But that's love your point man. Love your point. How do we how do we be connected?

: Yeah. Uh I'm just looking at chat here. Yeah. if there's something we can do. Uh, Fluffy, a few uh, weeks ago you were stressed and your mental health was starting to crash. Something told you to go on YouTube and you found a Christian video that flipped to switch me and get me back on track, but closer to God than before. Uh, you're actively changing things in your life, starting with my Twitch Discord and what you consume. Fluffy, that is fantastic. And let's go, dude.

: Yeah. And you were talking about doom scrolling and we've got other people, you know, I I had seen uh I haven't shared this too much on stream uh even in in my communities or other places. I had seen Samarella in a couple of different places around in the community and she'd maybe have been in my stream a time or two um but didn't come over very often. So, I was at a conference and and I got a laptop, so I brought it with me so I can still stream. Oh, wait. I'm in Colorado, so I'm 2 hours earlier. I can do my full stream before I start the conference. And then I'm getting up at like 4:00 in the morning and going, why am I doing this? And then I'm sitting there and I'm like going, oh my goodness, I'm half awake. I'm going to get no rest. This is I was up too late. I shouldn't be here. And and Samarella came in and it was a crisis moment. And I and it was the uh Okay, I know why I was here today. I know why I'm that weird person that travels and will stream anyway because I've got a set schedule because there might be a divine appointment that I I need to be there with someone. Uh I'm not alone because I'm not on 247. To go back to what you were talking about the whole idea of having 247 Christians on the space on the platform and in community places like Discord so that nobody is without hope uh any time of the day that they're online and looking for

: Hope. Anytime. Anytime. Yeah. It's just amazing like and it's just so cool and like we're we're gonna get to a point so soon um and and that we're actively talking about like going back to to HD of like how do we get global like so so much of our community is uh you know overseas and it's probably getting closer to 20% now. Like we're kind of getting up to we're getting getting more international people joining um and it's like man how do we serve them especially in like closed countries we got a bunch of people who are joining from like India and like it's like you there's no other way to reach these are closed countries you can't you can't go in there sharing the gospel but these tools that we have allow us to do that that's such an amazing thing. Um, I love looking at like one of my favorite things to look at my stats is how what percentage are outside the United States. That's my favorite thing. And then and then to see all of these weird countries listed that I've never been to, like you said, and closed countries that their their government hasn't figured out, and please don't anybody go tell them, um, that, oh, a platform like Twitch, it's gaming. There's people on there doing the gospel. Uh, that they can hear the gospel. The gospel's coming. The gospel is able to get to any place and oh, it's just it's just so much fun. Hey, Troy, good to see you coming in.

: Uh Troy just just graduated. So, you talk about we've got we've got some of us old fellas on the platform and we got some young guys on the platform and we got a bunch of gals all over the place. It's it's fantastic. Um that's right. It's awesome. So cool. I'm just trying to think where we're at, what we should what we should uh tackle next.

: Is there anything else that I haven't asked? I'll I'll give you that before I ask another question. Is there anything else that I haven't asked about that you think would be important for somebody to be thinking about who isn't sure if gaming is where they're at and if it's somewhere else, what they could apply from from what we're talking about to wherever they might be called.

: Man. Um, I would just say as believers the call that God Jesus gave to the disciples before he left to make disciples of all nations, that was not a suggestion to them. That was a command. And that command that he gave them today or then is is relevant for those of us who put our faith and trust in Jesus now.

: Um and so if you love this fa if you have a heart for people here, praise God. Step into that. There's so many ways that you can help share the gospel today online. Um like whether it's creating content, whether it's it's helping serve in some of these capacities, whether it's streaming, like whether it's just being and and caring and caretaking for the people who are doing this, like the the more that you are there and encouraging and lifting them up. Like even if you're not the person, like you are it is your responsibility as a believer to step in on this mission. Like we're in it together.

: Um, and so I would just say like do not do not let noise and comfort distract you from the joy and fullness of life that is found in pursuing God and sharing the gospel like and and the results and what comes of that the joy we get to experience from that is completely out of our hands, right? It's completely out of our hands if we get to be fruitful and we get to see lives like if we get to see uh people put their faith in in Jesus like we the Holy Spirit is moving in them but but God uses us to get to display that and just the act of stepping into it is a lifegiving joyfilled thing. Um and it is an absolute adventure that we get to get to be a part of.

: And I see too many, especially young men in this demographic that are um abdicating our responsibility to step in uh and and saying, "I'm fine with a life of comfort and noise that's going to distract me from the the reality of what God's called me into." Um, and and then that noise and that comfort can be led to all sorts of destructive behavior because you're not stepping into what God would have you do. So, um, like I it it's funny because people are like, "Oh, how does it feel now being in digital missions?" And I'm like, "Not all that different than it felt being in missions at Amazon, right?" Like, you know, it's it's totally it's a totally different experience. But like be on mission, right? Like God has got to the the community that God has given you is the community he desires you to share the gospel in.

: Um and so don't don't advocate that responsibility. There's way too much joy for you in that place that we get to be inv we're invited into.

: Oh yes. Yes. I love I love that purpose. Yeah. That's I'm I'm gonna make a note of that that word there because I'm always trying to find some little nugget in the conversation that's like here's going to be the uh the tag that I'm going to put on or the title I'm going to put on this whole conversation being invited into. I mean that's I I don't know what the title is going to be but that's that's you know yes.

: Yes. And there's and and the joy and life that comes in that is is amazing. And I I look around and I look at content and um I I I just look at the the world in general. Uh and I see a lot of discontent um boys who need to grow into being men into what God has for them. Um and and the discontent is the natural result of us not stepping into what God would have for us.

: Uh and but it's a world you you look at anxiety, you look at uh you you look at uh the amount of um addiction like like all those things like those are our natural outlet to the to a a life that is disappointed, right? Like disappointed with what's happening. Um, and so like I would just encourage you if you're feeling that there there depression, yes, that there's there's a reality that the enemy wants to blind us to what God would have us do.

: Um, and what God would have us do might seem like when you're when you're not in the middle of it, it might seem like, oh, that's work or that that's going to be a life sucking thing for me instead of a joyfilled endeavor um that's going to draw us closer to God and give us life and joy and the fruit of the spirit growing and measure in us. You know, like like who cares about making more money when you could go get to experience the the fullness of life and following Jesus? Like, praise God. Like, but but it's so easy to get distracted by those things. Not that making money is a bad thing or making more money is a bad thing. Those are great things, great gifts from God. Praise God. Um but they should not be our ultimate thing ever. Um and so I I don't know. I just kind of ran. I just raveled a little bit there, but hey.

: Hey, it's all good. It's all good. Um, by the way, those that those that weren't watching the chat because you can't see it on on on or you can't hear it on the podcast, uh, I just wanted want to point this out. Uh, our friend uh, Lena, who's here helping us with Samarella get information, was saying, "I still have two more people to contact." And we're like, "Who is that?" And she puts the names in, and one of the people instantly, Tiny House of Worship, was like, "Hello, I'm here." Um, and so it's just like the the the uh the man, the way that the Holy Spirit moves and works and the connections and several people sharing as we've talked about different things today about struggles with pornography or addiction and other things saying, "Yeah, I I have those struggles. I'm here. I have those, too. Let me put my hand up." And again, I'll just say if you are if you are on Twitch, you are on Discord, go join the Hopeful Disasters Discord. They have a great community helping out with that. Not that there aren't others. And and we with the Church Digital, we are working on a global plan to help with some addiction.

: I'm I'm sneaking some information out that nobody knows yet, but nobody's watching this podcast except my friends. So, I'm going to share this with all of you. Um it's it's coming. We're working with a global organization to help with some addiction uh recovery stuff. Uh it should be out by the end of the year. We're working through that trying to figure out how do we we we tailor it to digital spaces and make sure that that's a good thing. Uh or accessible and it's adaptable and all of those things. So really excited about those kinds of things. Uh interconnectedness with other people like we had people talking about ah growing faith is rating. Why don't you just go ahead and uh welcome welcome your raiders my friend. Welcome in Faith. Thank you so much. You are way too kind.

: Yes, we are podcasting today with the church digital. My buddy Flat Cap Dapper pastor who I pray for every day on stream. Doug, what's up, man? Joining joining the double join. I hope you had such an amazing stream. How were you? Were you Fortniting? What were you doing? But thank you. Thank you for trusting me with your community. Thank you everyone who's supporting Faith. She is such a huge part of HD and what we do and her prayers uh are amazing. So, um anybody who wants to join in and get to experience getting prayed for by faith, jump on in. But back to you. Yeah, that's all right.

: Uh for for those for those that do not know uh the church digital uh we are a digital missionary sending agency. And so uh I do a podcast here on Twitch and then it gets put other places. But unlike a lot of podcasts where you ju you just do a little short thing and you get it over with. Um that's not what Twitch is. Twitch is a hangout for a while. I don't know. Well that's a weird just resubed and it was bouncing all over. It was distracting me. I'm sorry. That's okay. That's okay. Um, so and I am flat cap dab or pastor. I have my own stream. I have several. I am never in one place doing one thing. I I dabble I dabble in all the different categories that are available of real life of uh animals uh and ponds and creation and sewing and crafting. Yes, I said sewing and crafting and cooking and podcasts. Uh oh, yes, and just chatting. Probably the thing I do the most. So, that's a little bit about me. We're just chatting about what it's like uh being a digital missionary in a space that needs the light of Jesus. Um so, I missed a whole bunch of chat. It just scrolled on by, but thank you everybody. If I missed something, please please send it again. Um, yeah, we'll we'll get to it at some point. I'm not even going to try to read the chat today. It's been just bomb. It's just been booming booming today. It's been awesome. So thankful for you all being here. Hopefully this is this is a joyfilled uh yeah, encouraging time for you all.

: Yeah, definitely. Uh well coming in with uh or I should say continuing on with thinking about hopeful disasters. You did Hope Con last year and now you're planning on it again for this year. So tell me how it was the the initial one. What was the what was the hope going into that? What did you learn and gain from that experience? And then shift and pivot to the plan for this year.

: Yeah, I we had the our vision and my my vision going into Hopecon because again we we talk about being the evangelistic arm of the local church. We want people to understand the value of inerson community. Uh because like we can live five years with somebody online, have relationship with them online and then we spend three days with them and our relationship and bond goes like this. Right. And it it goes so much deeper, more intimate. Um, and that's what we want to say like uh we want to get people experiencing that with the hope that like how do we also, you know, encourage you to find that community where you are.

: And so when we were, uh, when I was thinking about Hope Con specifically, like what God just continually laid on my heart was how do we create, um, an opportunity for people to experience what it looks like to grow in as disciples of God?

: Like what does, what does discipleship to Jesus and apprenticeship to Jesus look like on a daily basis? Um, and so much of that is modeled by the patterns in which Jesus did in his ministry, right? It wasn't, it's not just, it's not just reading the teachings of Jesus, it's also doing what Jesus did. And so for us, like I was like, we, I, I want us to have time, so much time devoted in individual prayer where we are off our devices, away, we are in prayer in solitude with God, in the word with God, serving in solitude, in, in quiet without noise and distraction. Um, and so we, that's really what our framework was. It was like, what, how can we equip and empower our people that we say this is what, this is what a daily walk with Jesus looks like. Let's do that together. And then you can go off in your life and experience it, the fruit of that. You experience the peace and the rest for your soul that everyone so desperately wants. Now let's, now you've experienced it. Now go back in your real life and then, you know, be fruitful and share that hope with others.

: And so that was my hope. Um, and what in the world, got a hype train coming? Thank you so much, man. You are way too good to me. That was crazy. Um, Consumed by Him. Those, those that are just listening, Consumed by Him has dropped the ten subs on Woofer. Uh, so kind. So awesome. So kind. So awesome. So we got a hype train going. Way too good to be way too good. I've had a couple of hype trains on the podcast, which is super fun. Um, that's, I mean, you've had some pretty legit. We're kind of at the bottom of the barrel now. Oh, no, no, no, no. The barrel is, I've got, I got a long way before I get to the bottom.

: Well, I always a quick stop at the bottom before you get to go back up to some more higher quality ones. Um, but uh, but yeah. Um, so that was the intention with HopeCon and you know, we were, we were really just curious on how God would show up, right? Like we're like, what is this really going to look like? And even up to the event, we had like three people registered and we're like, oh man. Uh, but one of the things, like we had a moment where we were, it was probably like in June and the event was in July. Uh, and we were like, oh man, do we, like should we even have this? We got like three people flying in, like feels like a, you know, a lot of work for this. Um, and uh, and then Ken registered from Hungary. Yeah. And flew in to be a part of HopeCon. And when Ken did that, there was no going back. We're like, we don't care if it's just Ken and us. We're doing this. We're figuring it out. And uh, at the time it was, it was awesome. Like I, we talked with my local church and they've been an amazing launch church for us. They have just cared for us in so many ways. They're the board of elders, um, has oversight on HD. Um, they're financially supporting us as an organization, but like they have just been amazing. Um, and so uh, but they offered their space to us and I was like, "Hey, can we just get a bunch of air mattresses and sleep on the floor in the gym?" And they're like, "Yeah, sure, whatever," you know, like, and so all the guys slept on the floor in the gym and um, the women went, all stayed at our house, which about fifteen minutes away, and they all had their own beds and everything. Um, and so yeah, it was just like we just were kind of like, we're going to just make this happen. We're just going to make this time happen and, and just, it was the most incredible thing. Like we had, um, on, on the Sat, or I think it was the Friday night. So I think it was Friday, Saturday, and then people kind of flew out Sunday. People kind of started flying in on Thursday, and it was like kind of all day. But um, on Friday night, we had just this incredible like four-hour impromptu worship night and it was just like John John and I were just sitting there and we were just like, "Oh, we're going to just practice and kind of rehearse." And um, I think was Charlie there too? I think it may have just been John John. I think Charlie may have been there too, but we were just practicing, rehearsing and then people just started like filtering in. Yeah. And like people just started worshiping with us as we were, and then all of a sudden everyone was in and we just kept going, like it was just like every time I was like, okay, it's been two hours, like I think we should be done. They'd be like, "One more," and we would just keep going. And even when we were done, it was like everyone was like, "We just want to stay in this moment together." Like being worshiping God, being together, being in community, like this thing that we do every week together. Yes. Um, you know, on Worship Wednesday of us together. We just worshiped together and then being together in person, hearing their voices, seeing hands, just like people just sobbing. Like it was just like this incredible worship of God. Like we just got to, like in so many ways, I was just like, "God, look at what you've done. Like look at this. Like this is incredible." And so yeah, we didn't have high expectations. We were just like, "We're going to show up." We ended up having like twenty-five people. Um, and you know, like just amazing time. Like the best time that we had was the like in between time or like the uh time afterwards at night when it was just the guys and we were like all on our air mattresses at the gym, you know, like nothing fancy. Um, and so we're just like, man, we, we just, you can't really replicate that level of, of just, yeah, it was just authentic, right? You know, like it was just God showing up and doing amazing things. And so in so many ways, we're like, man, we want him to do it again, but we're like, we think it's going to be something completely different. Uh, and it's going to be amazing too. So this year, um, you know, we, we really thought, like first of all, I'm from Seattle. Uh, for those of you who don't know, I'm from Seattle. Um, thank you, buddy. Um, and uh, I, uh, so I'm from Seattle, so it's not the easiest place to get to for those of you who don't know that. Uh, if you're not from this area, it's not like, it's not, it's not very central. Um, but it was the way we could keep it as frugal as possible. We're just like, let's keep it frugal. Let's make it easy. Um, and so this year we were like, okay, we could go back. We could do it in Seattle again, but what if we opened it up so that more people could be here? What would that look like? And so um, Nate, who's just an incredible leader, incredible, you know, administrator and researcher and everything, found this amazing campground, um, Christian camp, uh, in, uh, St. Louis. Uh, and so uh, so we are um, going to be there uh, in St. Louis uh, at the beginning of October. Um, and right now we have about forty people who are registered to go, which is so awesome. Like we're so excited. We raised like over two thousand dollars last week uh for scholarships to HopeCon because our desire is anybody who wants to come, come. Um, right now as an organization, we front the bill. And so we're like, we, we hope like we can, you know, be frugal and all that stuff, but at, we have to be able to pay for it. Um, but like we've raised enough money that we have, yeah, ten people who can come uh to HopeCon. Uh, or even potentially more. Um, James, I was just talking about you, man. Sorry. Sorry. I get excited. I was just talking about James. Uh, James is one of my friends. I, can we talk about like the importance of friends? Yeah. Shift wherever you need to. Yeah. Just stop the thought. I want to sidetrack. We'll come back later. It's all good. I, I want, I want, I'll come back, I'll come back to that, but just pin that question, like like the importance of of friendship and in ministry. Um, but yeah, High Hill Christian Camp in St. Louis, West St. Louis. It's going to be so amazing. Um, we, we just cannot, we, I cannot wait to be with the people there. So many people there who are brand new to our community who like just came in who are like, I have to be there. I want to be there. I want to be in community with you all. Um, like I can't, I can't wait. Um, and there's Matt. Matt's from my church. It's so good to see you, buddy. Um, and so we're uh, yeah, just so excited. Techie is going to be there. Uh, Sign of Divine's going to be there. Um, and yeah, it's just going to be this amazing time. Our hope is again that we have that people walk away from that weekend and feel rest for their souls, right? Like that's like the gift of gospel-centered community is one that we can encourage each other, lift each other up, and remind each other of the goodness of God. Um, and so we're going to spend a whole lot of time reminding each other of the goodness of God. Um, and we're going to spend a whole lot of time building patterns of rest. Um, and we're, you know, that's what, that's what it's all about. You're, you're selling me on this now, cuz I, man, you need it. Let us, let us, let us shepherd your soul, man. The patterns of rest. Uh, you know, that's, that is such a fantastic thing. Um, it's so important. It's so important. Absolutely. We, we live in a busy, busy world which will take every, every moment of our time and cause us to do something um, instead of resting and believing that God is enough and that he's got us. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. Yeah. And, and you, that is absolutely right. And again, we talked about noise and comfort, right? Um, and if we don't take, if we don't take the time to abide with Jesus and spend time and rest with him, um, then we, we just get in danger of having the world really, uh, dictate to us what is true and what is right and not the word of God and not the spirit of God working in us.

: Hey, uh, Flap, can I introduce you to my son, Jamie? Yeah, Jamie. Daddy's in the middle of something, but I wanted, can you say hi? How you doing? I've seen you on screen before many times. Yeah, he says I've seen you on screen before many times. Is that so silly?

: All right, daddy's going to finish up. Okay, you go take care of that, mama. I love you, bud. I really, I know. We're not going to do worship today, but we'll do it tomorrow. Do you need to, do you need to go soon or how long do we have? No, no, no, no. We have, we have as long. Okay. Yeah, we, we have as long. We're good. Okay. Good. Um, yes, we would love for you to come. Yeah. I say just thinking about the friends deal. Uh, I have, I have had a couple of uh, of those weird things that happen where if I, if you weren't my friend and you, and it wasn't a, oh, I don't know. So one of them was uh, earlier, well, actually last year, um, I got an invitation from someone who was in the States from overseas that I'm going to be here, which happened to be five hours away from my house. Um, oh, wow. And um, it was uh, here's when I'm available. Can you, can you come this day and we'll, we'll, we'll hang out for a couple hours and then we'll do lunch. So I, I drove five hours to get there to hang out for three hours to drive five hours back home. So I'm like, "Oh, but it was so, so good to even have the three hours. It was so good." And then so good. And this one just happened last weekend. So a friend of mine from uh, Georgia drives up to Chicago to go to an event for the weekend, finds out that they got cancelled from the event. Oh, and didn't know it, and now what am I going to do? And it's like, yeah, hey, how far away are you from Chicago? Well, I'm only three and a half hours, but you already drove all the way up from Georgia to get to Chicago, and you've got to drive back. I don't know. Is it worth your time to drive three and a half hours up to see me? Um, so, so they did uh, last Saturday.

: They drove up from Chicago. I got done with my prayer booth. I showed them around my town, showed him my prayer booth. She actually really wanted last year to see my prayer booth. She got to come up and do that. Um, nice. Her husband was with her. We picked up my wife. We went out to dinner and then we went for ice cream because why wouldn't you?

: Uh, yeah. And uh and then they they left, drove back to Chicago and the next day they drove back home to Georgia. Um, but we we'd known each other like three years online. You know, we had been connected. We had been praying with one another. We had shared what's going on in ministry with one another. So, it wasn't a Twitch connection, but the same way that digital friendships are real friendships and we would sacrifice.

: And actually, on some level, it's like cuz I've never met some of these people. Like, oh yeah, I'll absolutely give that up. My my best friend from high school that lives two hours away. Yeah, maybe I'll go ride bike with him in the next month. Maybe it'll be July. Maybe it'll be August. I don't know. Yeah. Um, but if somebody came uh up from some place that I didn't know two hours away and said, "Hey, you doing anything tomorrow?" I go, "Oh, I'll be there." You know, it's that kind of depth of uh relationship that you're developing and growing. So, I totally get that. That's why we want to get together is we have deep relationships already and we want to grow them. Uh we want them to get deeper. It was Oh, it was just such a good time hanging out in person. That's that's the other thing, you know.

: There's another draw is to Okay, get to get to Seattle. Oh, wait. No, St. Louis. It's closer. I could drive to St. Louis. It's so close. Yeah, it's so close. It's so close. And that was the whole point. Like I I had a conversation with one of um one of the men uh who was considering coming. Um and he was like, "Ah, man. I'm going to be in this seminar all week in preparation for my new job in ministry. Oh. And so like I'm I'm going to be in this thing all week and then I'm going to come to Hope Con. Like I'm just going to be tired and like that's going to be a lot. And like And I was like, "Dude, let us care for your soul." Yeah. Yeah. Like let us let us help you rest, man. Like that's the whole point of this. Like let us help you step in and and care for you and and like and he was like okay and then he came and it was like he's like I don't know he he was like this was absolutely what God wanted me to do like this was it was gamechanging for him as he was stepping into ministry like it was huge and so yeah I'm just so so excited and hopeful for what God is going to do next in Hope Con um and yeah to just be a part of it and like be really open-handed with it, right?

: We're just like, "God, we want we know what you have laid on our hearts and we're going to trust you that you're going to work in amazing ways in people's lives. Um, and we're going to be faithful to what we believe you're calling us into." Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. And that's all we can do. That's all that's all we can do.

: And so, um, but let's talk let's talk friendship. Um and and and I want to um I want to just talk about my friend James. Yeah. Um James is uh I've known James now for eight years. He was the very first person that I met on Twitch. He was a live streamer um at the time, like when I first was introduced and kind of looking around and exploring it. Um, and I could tell instantly right when I got on his stream, I was like, "Oh, that guy's a believer." Like, it was like within a second, he didn't say anything about it. That was before the Christian tag. So, there was no way to identify us. There was no way to identify us. We were just all over scattered.

: Um, and so I just happened to be in a stream and like within within a minute I was like, "Oh, this guy loves Jesus." And I ended up um getting him a job here in Seattle. Oh. And uh yeah, it was awesome. And I picked him up at the airport and he and I like my airport's about 45 minutes away. We spent 45 minutes just talking about pornography and confessing sin to one another in our very first interaction. Wow. outside of like being on the phone together. It was just one of those things where I was like instantly I was like he is one of those Jonathan David connection kind of like my heart has always just been knit to his and he has been like I I talk to him like outside of like ministry stuff like I talk to him almost every day pray for him every day. I pray for him like the same amount of time that I pray for my kids. I pray for James and like and it's just been amazing. Like it's just so cool to have partners in ministry from the beginning. Like he and I like he for I told you the story like he is the first person he and his wife um came to us and we we really like got to map out what what God would be calling us into in this and to watch uh God work in his life and to get to partner with him has just been like the most amazing thing.

: Um, and it's just been such an unbelievable gift that God has allowed uh us to do ministry together in in really hard seasons and really, you know, like in all of it, right? Like the reality uh and yet to look at it and be like this is nothing that we could have ever even dreamed of it being, right? Four years ago, it's basically four years ago to to this day. It was the first week of June really that I called that I called that I texted James and was like, "Hey, we're we're talking about we're talking about something, you know." Um, and so yeah, it's just it's wild to see, you know, how God has worked. But I've just been so incredibly thankful. I'm just so thankful on how God uses those around us, uses gospel-centered community in our lives to to push us into what he wants us to step into. And James has been a huge part of that for me. Um, and so it's cool to see him here and get to uh get to honor him too as just a huge part of this journey.

: That's that's so cool. Uh, yeah. The well I I love saying this phrase and and I I stole the phrase so I'll give credit to to where it's where it's due is um I've got got friends in Chicago uh with exponential and uh new thing and new thing uses that all the time friends on mission and uh I love saying friends on mission uh I love that language because you are a friend on mission together we are in the body of Christ together uh if we never get together in person because it just doesn't work out. It doesn't work out. If we get together, we're going to have a great time together. I know that it's going to be a blast. And and and I take I take one selfie to prove that it happened and I put the phone away. I'm just going to enjoy the rest of the time.

: Um you know, it's the You have to have that. The evidence. Yes. The evidence that it happened. Yeah. Photos or it didn't happen. Uh, what's funny though is is I just post the photo with no name. If you don't know who the person is, you don't get to know who I was with. So, you didn't miss anything. It is so funny. Like, I I have met obviously James and everyone within HD. Um, I've met Pastor Don um in person. I've um uh Epitome uh came and stayed at our house like a month ago. He was coming to Seattle for a wedding. I was like, "Stay at our house, man." Um and then we have friends that we met uh you know through Twitch who now come for every Thanksgiving down from British Columbia. They come down and it's like it's just amaz it's just so cool. Yeah. you talk about people staying at your house. So, I've I've gone to Orlando for several different conferences and and I've stayed at at a friend of mine's house down there. Uh he's coming up here to a conference in July. He's going to stay at my house. So, it's like, oh, let's go. I get I get to reciprocate the the odd thing that he was coming up here to a conference. He's like, I'll even buy a ticket to the conference for you. I'm like, super cool. So yeah, that is amazing. Yeah, it's Oh, it's so it's it's so it's so cool.

: And I think about it, too, cuz like I have I really have like five to ten people that I pray for every day. Yeah. That are on mission, right? Like you're one of them, right? You're one of them. Pastor Dustin's one of them. Al's one of them. uh Epitome, Jade Live, like HD team, you know, there's there's there's this this group of of of people that God has really laid on my heart because there's um there's there's there's a group of us that are really like it comes back to the idea of like who's who's on here sharing the gospel. Yeah. Right. Um, and there's a lot more that are sharing the gospel, too. But like I feel like God has just like knit my heart with you guys. Yeah. Yeah. You know, and like and like just really like there there is a commonality in what we're trying to do. Um that it's just like God just continually like lays you on my heart again and again until it's just become like a oh, I'm just praying for you every day. You know, like when I'm like, "Oh, God, who else should I pray for?" It's like, "Oh, no. It's always the same people, so I'm going to like I'm going to continue to lift you up in prayer." Um, yeah.

: And there is there is nothing wrong with praying for the same people. I mean, like Paul talks about that. He keeps praying for the churches that he has been to and he's ministered with. Um, and he's asking the reciprocal uh of that. Uh, and we did have a question earlier, so I'll let you take, uh, first crack at this. Um, Lena, uh, Samson Sense may have stepped away, but I'll ask a question anyway. And uh, yeah. How do you guys pray? Like what do you do to make it a proper effective one?

: I like I just love the genuine like like what do you do to pray? How do you make it a genuine effective prayer? Man that is such a good question. Um for me so much of of my prayer life is centered around how do I how do I seek solitude with God. Um and so generally my prayer time doesn't start with me saying anything. Um, my prayer time starts with me just sitting sitting in the quiet, eyes closed, eyes open, doesn't matter. Just like um there's a there's a Life House song called Breathing. Um, have you heard that song before? I I think I have. Okay. The the chorus of that song is so good. It's um I'm It's like I'm hanging on every word you're saying. And even if you don't want to speak tonight, that's all right with me because I want nothing more than to just sit outside heaven's door and listen to you breathing. That's where I want to be. Um and I think about that every time that I I start in my solitude time of like, God, I'm I'm not going to ask you anything. I'm not going to seek anything. I'm not not going to ask you for help. I'm just going to spend time with you just to be with you. And and the rest that I experience in that. Um and and the way that then the Holy Spirit in me starts targeting what I need to be praying for, it gets real specific real quick.

: Yeah. Yeah. You know, and so yeah, part of it it starts by we we just got to quiet our souls, you know. We got to quiet we got to we got to turn off the noise. We got to turn off all the sound around us. Um, and that is um a really hard thing in this world. Um, but that's that's where I start. I I start by um quieting my soul and then I start um when I actually am praying, I always want to start by um by thanking God for the realities that he's teaching me that day. I I want to rightsize my heart and my mind and remember how big God is and how small I am. Um, and when I do that, I can pray really big effective prayers because I'm not limiting God anymore by my scope of reality, right? Because we've got just this tiny vision like we're just in this tiny little bubble of of reality when God sees everything. And so starting by being thankful and grateful for the things that he is doing and and right sizing my mind around who God is.

: And then yeah, allowing the Holy Spirit to lead me in the things that are important to pray for today. Um, and so yeah, sometimes I go in um with a really, really specific prayer.

: Um, you know, if people, if we're on stream and people are, oh yeah, you know, asking me, you know, hey, can you pray for these situations? Um, you know, like in those types of situations I like to always call back by prayer into the gospel, right? Like, resolve this issue, but help us to know you deeper, grow in trust in you, faith in you, right?

: I rely on the promises that God gives us in scripture and really pray those, and then we bring our requests, whatever they are, right? Like, bring the request, whatever it is, and then pray through what is true in scripture about those things. Um, and so yeah, that's where I found it being most effective.

: Um, that was a big, long, rambling explanation, but yeah, I yeah, I think that's what I would say. Yeah. Uh, I love that. Like, you're, I'm trying to think of what word you use, but grounding in being present. I've heard that also termed uh centering prayer, of uh, you know, it's the center of things. It's the focus. I love what you're saying.

: So I am not, you know, just disagreeing with you in any capacity, but I love the breadth of different ways that people pray, the different possibilities around prayer. Uh, if you ever want to just explore what prayer can be, go read the book of Nehemiah. I believe there's eleven prayers in the book of Nehemiah that are prayed throughout the whole of Nehemiah.

: And my favorite one is, the king asked me. So I prayed to the Lord and I answered the king. How long was that prayer? Like, the king ain't waiting on you. He just asked a question. Okay. So, so it is, I've already prayed in advance for all of these things, and now it's in the moment, and I think that prayer was, let's go God. That's it. Like, something short, sweet, like that. It's all it was. It's get him God, or open his heart God, just some one short little phrase that took all of the time, all the preparation of stuff he was doing. Because the first prayer uh starts and he says, "I was in fasting and prayer and mourning for several days," and then all of a sudden the next statement is months and months later. Like, okay, so this was this prolonged process of long, enduring prayer that was, but it wasn't always the same. There was also the sprinkle of momentary prayers of things in the moment that happen. Uh, I think for myself though, the best piece of prayer for me is praying with others. Not just being alone, of praying with others, of taking turns. Now, as I pray on stream, it's not always the easiest to do that, to, you know, 'cause I'm the streamer, so I'm the one praying. Uh, or I go to your stream, you're the streamer, and you're the one praying. Uh, right. But when we can take turns, and I do this in a lot of small groups, uh, pastor groups, everyone pray as you feel led. Oh, yeah. And you know what? We don't have to all pray. Oh, yeah. And we can pray more than once. Or you do it another way. One of one of my favorite ways of praying in a group is uh you pray for one person, that person prays for someone else, and you end up with everyone in the group praying for someone else in the group.

: Yeah. Love that. And and so so prayer I think is also about the body and about community and those aspects. And I do believe when people are putting amens in the chat that they are in agreement. Uh, when they're putting emojis in the chat when prayers are taking place, that they are participating in it. Uh, yeah. So I think our heart posture is the thing for me that I think of as what's important for the prayer to be powerful and effective.

: My heart posture is coming from a place of, I want to be like you were saying, I want to be in the presence of my heavenly father. I want to share the concerns of my heart with my heavenly father. I want to give them over to the heavenly father to do what is best because he knows better than I do. And I want to ask boldly because he can do more than I imagine he can do. Uh, praise God. So yeah. So I don't, I don't know if I don't know if Luna is here, but um I wanted to answer that question that came up. I think that's a powerful thing. And I'm actually just feeling right now we should probably just pray for Samarella. Uh, is there anyone else that you feel pray uh that we should be praying for?

: I think praying for Samarella would be a good, wise thing right now for sure. Okay. Uh, God, I'm just lifting up Samarella. Uh, I have seen, and this community and others, we have seen your spirit working in her life. Uh, and and now she's in a place where her physical body needs some healing. Uh, it needs some restoration. Uh, she's gone through many a trial and a tribulation and a struggle, and now she's uh for her best uh outcome, she's been put into a medically-induced coma. And I don't know your plans, God, but I would so love to see Samarella in person one day. I don't know if that'll ever happen. I'm praying for that opportunity to be there.

: And one way that that opportunity will be there is for you to bring healing and restoration to her body. Uh, to heal her body from the cancer that's been there, to heal her body after the surgery. We know that surgery is a toll on the body. Medications are there to help, but it is you who will knit her body back together.

: So we are praying for you to intervene in this circumstance to bring full health and restoration to her because we know that you can. And and that's what we're praying for. Um, yeah, Lord. So God, pour that out upon her. We believe it. We're calling upon you. We're trusting in you. And and even if you don't, we thank you for the opportunity to come before you and make our hearts known. Um, to just do something amazing like this across the stream, across the globe.

: Uh, I've seen it before. I know that you have that power, and we're calling upon that one more time. So God, if it be your will, raise her up fully restored, that she might be able to join back into these communities and do more than we could even imagine her to be able to do, to spread the good news of Jesus. God, I just pray this and ask your blessing upon her. And we thank you for her friend Lena who's been able to share updates with us.

: Just give Lena everything that she is in need of uh to be a supportive friend, of connecting and and transmitting uh communication for us. We are so thankful for that. Um, and putting her in our lives too, God. We just pray this and thank you in Jesus' name. Amen.

: Amen. Oh, wait. Wait a second. Can you hear, can you hear me? I can hear you. You just uh your cam's gone. It's gone. It should be back, though. Hold on. My uh my OBS just crashed. Oh, no. Yeah. Yeah. No, no worries. It's the least of my concerns.

: All right, let's see. Virtual. Let's get this back going here. I'm going to do this. I'm going to do that, and then do this. And hopefully, hopefully that works. Oh man. And sorry about that. You know, one of these days I'm going to just put all of the clips of uh tech problems together, and and and so when you come to the channel to watch the stream, it'll just be all of these clips of tech problems, and then the stream will start, and you won't know it started. It'll just be tech problems, and when it starts, you go, "Oh, I must have just been watching new clips." I like it. I like it.

: All right. And we're back. And we're back. Hey, first try. First try. All right. Very cool. Uh, you might need to uh resync the, oh, yeah. Let me look. Oh man. Yep. We got it sharing again. Okay. Also, I was looking at my settings. I have it set so that links are able to be shared. So, maybe it's uh something in the settings for streaming together that's not bringing it over to mine. But okay. All right. This is, I'm going to, this is the link.

: Yeah. Copy and paste it back in there. Yeah, that's, I'm banned from chat. What? It says you are banned from chat. You are unable to participate in this channel chat until the moderator unbans you. What in the world? Okay. Thank you, Broadberry. Must be that link. Was it the link that, okay, so I, okay, I will have to look into because it was the bot that banned you. I'll have to look into the settings on the bot. I was looking under Twitch settings. It must be a setting in the bot. Oh my goodness. That's so good. That's so funny. Oh yeah, that's perfect. That's perfect. Oh man, as is tradition, you know, like we getting banned from the chat. This is the best way, man. That's the best way. That's so good.

: We've kind of talked about some of this. I'm going to go in a uh two directions here. One, okay, is to talk about what have you done on your streams and what are you currently doing on your streams, and then we'll shift and we'll talk about um uh yeah, let's just do that. Let's just, what are, what have you done and what are you currently doing on your streams?

: Yes. So, like I said at the beginning, um before there was kind of just chatting before that was like a mainstream thing. Um, I played just a dumb little mobile game uh called Summoner War. Uh, and so I, that was the main focus of my streams for the first six years, five years, whatever. Um, and I felt, you know, it's really funny, midway through that I I felt like um in praying that God was calling me away from that and away from that game.

: Um, but I was like, what am I supposed to do? This is the only thing. Like, I don't, if I don't have this, then like, I have nothing. Yes. Then what do I stream? My whole community is based on this game. There are people who play this game that I'm trying to care for and love. Um, and so but yeah, just around that time, like when I was like, all right, I'm going to step away, was when the Christian tag came and just chatting kind of started taking off, and you know, more of more of that.

: So, I just felt real compelled like, no, I'm going to show up and I'm going to share the gospel. And that is what the majority of my stream is today. Like, I spend probably an hour just praying for everybody who comes in who has prayer requests and just kind of caring for them, uh, sharing the gospel and proclaiming that.

: And then uh most of my streams, the majority of it is either spent in worship, so us doing um yeah, me playing guitar, doing worship songs, taking requests, and us worshiping together. Um, or doing kind of like an ask me anything format, or reacting to kind of Christian content or things like that. So that's really been the focus of my stream.

: I've played a few times Fortnite on stream, so bad that it's painful. Um, and so yeah, people don't generally stick around and watch it, but it's also just really challenging to do that. Like, it's really, really challenging for me to to um to play a game like that and feel like I can effectively communicate uh with the community.

: Um, and so yeah, it's just not really, like, I'm just not geared to be able to like jump back and forth between things very well. Um, and so like, I've always found if you're not like super good at a game and then you're not engaging your community, then people are like, you know, people aren't gonna stick around. Like, you got to either be really good at something or you've got to be engaging people. Yes. And so yeah, kind of have gone away from from kind of uh Fortnite and that type of thing.

: I have played a few games of Risk um which is a board game, which is a little bit easier to navigate between those um with the intent and the hope of like driving people, you know, who are kind of just playing Risk or board games or whatever, that would find my stream. Um, but yeah, my, I've been thinking more about what does it look like to be um to be more of an evangelistic um place online?

: You know, I love Worship Wednesday and that will always continue like that. That won't stop. That's such a joyful time for me.

: And, um, but there are opportunities to do like Music Mondays where it's all kinds of music, you know, or something else where it's like trying to drive people.

: Sorry, I'm just laughing at the because I do the same thing with Torah Tuesday, you know. Yes. And Messiah is key. Is key.

: Yes. Yes. So, um, yeah, with all of that, I just, um, yeah, I'm always open to where God would be having me.

: Um, I have been overwhelmed by how much God has used my stream format, which is very Christian content focused, to drive non-believers into my stream.

: Like, I'm just very. Yeah. But the key is no friends on Wednesday. Friendship is for Fridays. You can't. You can't. Yeah. People come in and they want to chitchat and they want to make. No, we're not making friends today.

: Friendship Fridays. Friendship Fridays. That's right. Worship Wednesday. We are here to worship, you know, like Team No Pants Thursdays and Team Ants. Team No Pants Thursdays.

: Yes, the Church Digital Thursdays. You know, I love the people listening on the podcast who have no idea what Team Thursday is. It makes it way better.

: Oh yeah. Especially the people that are only going to listen to the audio and it's no clue why we just had that whole conversation.

: Oh, it's gonna be so good. It's so good. So funny. Yeah. But yeah, I think the crux of this is like I am always kind of exploring what the content would look like that would drive more people.

: I pray every stream that more, um, God would bring more people who hate Jesus into my stream, you know, and more people. Okay, so that leads me into a question.

: You can go either direction with this. What have been some obstacles that you have had to overcome as a streamer, which could be those trolls and things like that.

: And what's a story, and you've already shared some, but a story of unexpected blessing that happened through your stream? Wow. Wow. I could go on forever with unexpected blessing.

: Um, you know, we'll do another podcast on that then. We'll just do another podcast. Yeah. Just on that one specifically. Um, yeah, I would say biggest obstacles to me in streaming.

: Yeah. When I got banned for sure. Um, when I got banned from Fly Caps chat. Biggest obstacle. Fifteen for fifteen minutes. Fifteen minutes ago.

: Yes. Um, so I, uh, yeah, I would say, you know, people come in, you know, this like people come in and it happens way more when I stream on TikTok honestly than it happens on Twitch these days.

: Um, but people come in and are just hostile towards the gospel and hate me. Um, and call me racist, homophobe, bigot, you know, misogynistic, all the things without even seeing anything.

: Just saying, "Hey, I want to pray for you." Um, and when those people come in, you know, it's really funny because I will say to them like, "Hey, you're coming in here and you're thinking you're going to discourage me, but Jesus actually said you would come and I prayed that you would be here today and so you're actually encouraging me by being here." And so that's amazing, you know, and so like most of the time, you know, they don't stay, they'll leave or sometimes they do stay and, you know, lurk for a while or, you know, sometimes they, you know, put an Old Testament verse out of context and say, "Explain this and want to debate." And, you know, like for me, I'm like, "Hey, there's plenty of apologetics streams out there and like that's not what I'm doing.

: That's not a fruitful use of time or a stream. Happy to have a conversation with you at any point, but that's not what we're going to do today."

: Um, that doesn't bother me. Yeah. The biggest thing for me that has been the biggest deterrent, it has not been outside of the church opposition.

: It's been within the church. Mm-hmm. Um, and that's both on Twitch and not on Twitch, you know, like, um, that has been, you know, people in my life who have, you know, said, "Hey, this is really foolish or you're being very naive stepping into this place." Um, you know, like we've had people who are like, "Oh, I'm really worried that Ryan stepping in online is going to get sucked in and you know, like all this stuff." And I'm just like, you know, the amount of discouragement that has come from outside from people who just don't understand, right?

: It's just like, you just don't understand what we're doing and how we're trying to be faithful to what God is calling us to.

: So, I have grace for them, but I'm still like it's still like the same thing with that guy posting, you know, online community is not real community.

: And I'm like, if you don't know, don't say. Just like, don't speak out of ignorance. Just, you know, you don't know the impact these words have on people like me who are like, man, that is so deflating when you see that.

: Yeah. Um, yeah. And so, but like even within the Twitch community, um, and how I've heard things and slander against me and against my wife and from other Christians and like that, I'm just like that breaks my heart.

: And you know, I still, even when I hear those things, like I still pray for them and I care for them and like I'm for them one hundred percent.

: But it's just like, man, those things are those feel like soul level things. Um, and that is by far the biggest challenge.

: Way more like I'll take someone hating me for loving Jesus all day. Like people come in and they're like, I go on TikTok and they are just like, you know, like on Twitch, well in three, four hours of streaming one hundred to one hundred fifty people come in, right, unique viewers come into our stream, right? Like, and you know, most of them, there's a few new people who come in every stream. If I go on TikTok in thirty minutes, fifteen hundred people will come in and because it's just they're just doing this and so people be like, oh, this guy's praying. Boom, you're a racist homophobic bigot. Boom, next one. And you know, so like when I go on TikTok, it's just like an onslaught of people who just absolutely hate me.

: So, but like that again, I'm like, I'm okay with that. I expect that. Jesus said that was coming. So, actually, if we're blessed when we step into that space, Jesus said we are.

: Um, and so we get to experience just like the tiniest bit of disrespect that Jesus dealt with every day of his ministry. Um, and yet the disrespect that we experience from within the church, even if it's just the tiniest bit of what Jesus dealt with, it feels so much more because I'm like, you should know better. Like, you should be the ones encouraging us. You should be lifting us up. You should be praying for us. Um, and, uh, and so yeah, those are the ones where I've had to have the most conversations and the most like going to Jesus and being like, "Hey, you're revealing to me these deep places in my soul that I have this pride in my heart that, um, when I'm misunderstood or feel disrespected that I want to lash out and I'm like, I see it." So, thank you for showing it to me and help me to not take it personally and help me see it as an opportunity of sanctification in my life. Um, that I would grow more like you. Um, but it's been hard.

: It's been a really hard lesson to learn. Oh, yeah. The, uh, it depends on the level of respect you have for the person who is saying those things.

: Um, true, true. Because there has been a few times where people have, you know, said things against the Church Digital that never will say anything good about anything digital online.

: Church can't be there. And if they call us out for that, we're like, "Oh, we're getting attention. That's not a bad thing." Uh, you're actually noticing that we're doing something.

: Um, but if it's somebody that I've worked in ministry with and then it would happen. Oh, that hurts so much more.

: Yeah. Uh, because the level of relationship makes it more of a stab in the back. Uh, yeah. And yeah, and it's and didn't you know me well enough that if there's something going on and it's something we need to resolve and it's something you heard that you would come to me and we'd have a conversation and instead of instead of just assuming things or assuming the worst, or airing all of that publicly, instead of like you can DM me.

: You don't have to air that publicly. DM me and tell me those things. So yeah, an enemy can't betray you, River. Exactly. Exactly. Yeah.

: Yeah. Yeah. You feel that. You feel the reality of that. And, um, it's been amazing to see how again, you go back to it, how God even uses those things that the enemy would use for evil, try to derail you, try to distract you, and it's used for my good.

: And I'm like, I can see these areas that I need to submit to God more in and trust him more in knowing that he continually affirms that we're in the right spot.

: Yes. And so I don't have to be defensive. I don't answer to anyone but God, right? Like I don't have to defend myself.

: I can just step forward in obedience in faith, right? Yeah. It reminds me of the passage of, you know, not putting your pearls before swine. When, yeah, you know, there's the two levels. We've talked about those who are not in digital spaces who don't understand. Well, I don't share with them the fullness of my vision of what God's called me to because they might not understand that at any capacity.

: They do not have an open heart and mind to see it. Uh, it doesn't mean they won't. It just means currently they don't.

: Uh, and today, yeah, today they do not. And, and then there's also the, yeah, sometimes when you share that and you think that other people in your small circle of Christian supporters who understand digital of like I'm going in this direction and it's like not the direction they're called.

: They should be excited for you and supportive of you instead of, oh no, you can't do that. Oh, you're doing it wrong. Oh, well I wouldn't do it that way.

: Well, you're not me, so you don't have to do it that way. Uh, right. But yeah, like anybody out there who's thinking of, "Oh, I'm going to go to a podcast on whatever platform you're listening to, Apple Podcast, Apple Play, whatever it is, or Spotify or iHeart Radio is going to go, oh, wow, this guy does three-hour long podcasts. That sounds great. Let me listen to those. I bet those are amazing." Um, I'm not choosing to do two to three hour podcasts because it's going to be on another platform.

: I'm doing these on Twitch for the live experience and they'll get posted later. So, if you don't understand the culture here and I'm going to like, they're not there yet, but I'm just hypothesizing here how funny that's going to be when somebody makes a comment of, "Dude, your podcasts are too long. Can't you shorten these up?" Yeah. Like, this isn't about that. It's not about that. It's not about that. It's and it's also it's not about you being here for the whole three hours either.

: It's about you popping in and out for whatever time that you were able to glean anything in the conversation in the chat or in our conversation here and to lift you up in that moment for the rest of your day.

: Right. Praise God. And that takes a whole lot of the pressure off, right? Like, and that's, you know, when I've been so consumed with like, oh, I need to grow this channel or I need to like, when I get focused on those things, like everything feels like work.

: Oh, you want to, yeah, just like we, I'm teaching and anybody that wants to know, uh, being a digital missionary, we have a course, uh, equipping digital missionaries.

: I'm not here to plug that, but just to let you know, I'm going to reference it so you'll know what it is. Um, in our cohort, we're just talking about the metrics. What are you measuring and all the vanity metrics that you can have around how many new subs, how many new followers, how many new likes, how many shares, whatever vanity metric you have. None of those have anything to do with relationship. What's a pretty cool metric is, uh, I, this is as long as whatever length of time you've been able to be an affiliate and have someone who has subbed to your channel for a year, two years, three years, that's a relationship. That's a metric there, that's a relationship there. Um, and then other ones that will just throw you off like you think you've gotten something.

: So I don't know how long I've been getting a monthly payout from Twitch, which is nothing to be excited about. It's not.

: Yeah, yeah, yeah, right. But last month I didn't get one. You know how bad that made me feel? Because I focused on, I didn't get a payout. I focused on those things and then it caused me to go look at, well, how many people are showing up in my chat? Like, the one thing all of a sudden caused me to reflect on all of those things.

: So I start looking at all those things and then I don't know. It's got to be the Holy Spirit just said, "Have you ever had a stream and nobody showed up?" Because you know what? The majority of people who stream on Twitch stream to one to two people and you've never had that few of people show up to your stream. Stop looking at yourself and look at the stories of impact and then just hold on to those. I'm not doing it for money anyway. I mean, if I didn't get a payout, you know, I'm not doing it for money. You know, there's, if you're doing it for money and you have a month with no payout, you did something wrong.

: Um, but just off of those thoughts, just to pivot to, what are like maybe two stories, and we'll just kind of end with that? Uh, two stories of blessing, unexpected blessing that you've experienced either in your stream through your community or you yourself. It doesn't matter which area you pick.

: Yeah, man. I mean, the story of the person from church and TikTok was just incredible. Um, that blessing was, oh yeah, unlike anything I could have ever imagined, like so supernaturally driven by Jesus. It was crazy. Um, but I think there was another one, um, too that I had. Oh, I had it and I just lost it after three hours of streaming. My brain isn't as sharp as it was. What one was I thinking of? Um, oh, I was thinking about, oh yes, this was the thing. Um, so, you know, this one wasn't necessarily on Twitch, but it was part of, you know, content creation, right? Part of digitally sharing.

: Um, and I had this video I posted on YouTube and I remember getting a bunch of like instant traction, right? Like I had like 1500 views on the video or something. I was like, "Oh, cool," like it was just a short and I was like, and it was like right away, like within 30 minutes, 1500 views and I was like, oh, how cool is that? And then I start looking at all the comments and people are just railing. They're just like, stop spewing this hate on YouTube. Like, why does this keep showing up on my feed? Like, this is just a bunch of like sky daddy, like all this stuff, just like, and I was like, oh, that's why people are commenting on it and just hate it. Okay, cool. Um, but there was one comment, you know, and like I answer every comment, even the ones that are just hateful. But there was one where the guy wrote, uh, the comment was, "Why do you post things like this? Everybody knows this already. Like, I just don't understand why you made this video." And like I looked at it and at first I was like, I said to myself, like, another troll, like whatever, you know, like in my head, like I'm thinking, like, okay, you know, add it to the people that are just mad about this. But then I started thinking, um, what if I just thought about it like, what if he was sincere in this question? And I thought, and I was like, this could be a very sincere question. I'm going to answer this question as if he really just wants to know instead of assuming that he's just trying to be a jerk, right? Which was like my natural inclination. Oh, this guy on the internet just, and I was like, "Okay." So I just like sat down and I was like, "Hey, thank you so much for this question. Um, like the reason why I post videos like this is because when I was 19 years old, I was incredibly hopeless. Uh, I was struggling. I was all alone. Um, and Jesus found me and he took my heart and he transformed my heart and he gave me joy that I live with now that I can't help but share that joy with the others around me and I get to be a vessel of that of God to share the good news. And so, yeah, my hope is to find people who are struggling like I was at that age because I know there's so many people with hopelessness that I can share the good news with. And so, yeah, thank you for watching, you know, and, uh, you know, hope this helps answer that question." And he responded back in like two minutes and he said, "That's me. I need that hope. Can you help me?" Oh, and I was, and I was like, you know, like, oh, like instant tears, like just like, God, thank you for letting me get beyond myself for a second, beyond my pride and my, and get to like see a hurting person. Um, and he came joined Hopeful Disasters Discord, has been there for like four years. Oh man. Um, and to just, you know, like I don't know if he's made a declaration of faith yet in his life. He's been kind of inactive over the last six months or so, but you know, like I've just been like, God, you used that for fruitfulness. Like, and that was just such an unexpected blessing for me that, um, yeah, God was just like, slow me down. Slow, slow down your thought process and just stay in it, you know, like stay, don't run from it. Stay in it. Um, so that was certainly one of my top blessing moments.

: Yeah, and I got another one. Go for it. Go for it. I love these stories. I mean, these are the things that I like. If people stayed to the end, they get the goodies here at the end. We're going to reward them with all these goodies if you stay to the end. The goodies, man. Um, this is one of my favorite and I will not say the name of the individual. Um, but I was live streaming about a year ago. Um, and in the midst of, you know, my story and kind of sharing the gospel and everything, um, this guy came in and just, you know, actively around in my stream and just kind of hanging out. Um, and, uh, you know, I'm sharing my story and all of a sudden the topic of pornography and my addiction comes up and you know I'm sharing the story of how deep rooted pornography was for me and how I was just constantly striving to beat it by myself and just being told like I got to fix, work harder, work harder, work harder, fix this sin, fix this sin. Like, um, so I'm sharing my story and how God took me when I finally was in gospel centered community and able to bring this thing to the light with the people and men around me, how God truly like fixed my heart, like as it says in Romans 12:1, man, in view of God's mercy, like when my eyes were focused on Jesus in gospel centered community, um, you know, he gave me a new heart. In view of God's mercy, offer your bodies as living sacrifices, holy and pleasing to God. This is your spiritual act of worship. Do not conform any longer to the patterns of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. And like that was for me. I'm like, I experienced that transformation. Like it wasn't that I was like, "Oh, I'm going to work really hard." It was just like, I don't want those things anymore, right? Because they're keeping me from knowing Jesus deeper. Like, why would I want that when I can have Jesus? Like, what? Um, and so I'm explaining this. I'm sharing this story and this guy just comes in and he's like, "You have no idea. Like, I've been on my knees sobbing, asking God to help me with my pornography addiction, and I just happened to jump into your stream right now. Um, and hearing this is exactly what I prayed for this morning, like 30 minutes ago, and is like such an answer to prayer. Like, can you help me?" And I was like, and at that point, I'm telling you, it like, fight for free. So this was, this was two years ago. This wasn't a year ago. At that point, we had started Fight for Freedom that previous Monday. Oh no. And I was like, not only can I help you, we just started this group. And he was like, praise God, I need that. Let me, he's been in the group for two years. And he's experienced freedom from pornography for the first time in his entire life since he was eight years old. Like, oh wow. Young. Oh wow. It was that young. And that's, that's the age now. My kid is about to be nine and I'm like, I cannot believe that I have to talk to him about this, you know, like I have to have guardrails around this and that his friends are already struggling with this, some of them. Um, and so yeah, but it's, um, it's just that was one of my favorite things ever because again comes back to like what the enemy would use for shame in my life. I have no shame. It has no shame over me anymore and I can talk about it with freedom and God can use it in a fruitful way in other people's lives and that's just like to me that has been the ultimate gift, you know? So yeah, yeah, so those are my two favorite.

: Oh, those are, those are both fantastic. Those are definitely, uh, worth clipping and sharing, uh, with other people about, hey, can you really have life change online? And the answer is yes. Uh, well, why do you ask the question? You like, excuse me, can I have, can you have life change from reading a tract? I'm sorry, but you know, uh, that was a technology of a hundred years ago, 200 years ago, of here a pamphlet in your hand, read it and let the Holy Spirit impact you. Now we're using digital. So, uh, yeah, uh, life change is going to happen with there. Um, yeah, and anybody that is struggling with that and listen to this, I would just say, yeah, join the Hopeful Disasters Discord, get connected with this group or find another group, find a place that's it. Don't struggle alone. Struggling alone and struggling in silence is not going to get you there most of the time. There's a few miraculous stories out there.

: Yeah, and the Holy Spirit can do it. So it wasn't alone. Anyway, but, uh, yeah. Yeah. Oh, man. That's just beautiful. Yeah. On that note, like just one thing around this specifically, um, uh, the lie that is so often believed by people struggling in isolation is that no one will understand this. Yep. And like my sin is so much worse than yours or I've gone deeper than you could ever go. Like that is a lie. That is a lie. We do deep confession in Fight for Freedom. Like I want to get to like the deep levels of things you have never shared with anybody knowing that there's freedom there. Like there will be nothing but the love of Jesus back to you. Um, and so just just wanted to like put that out there because I know even within that like there are people who are like, I really need that, but like I just don't think anyone's going to understand my struggle or where I'm at. Like we will and we do and there's mercy and there's grace for you. Um, and so just wanted to, uh, oh, are you still here? Okay. Can you hear me? You're back. Did something happen? Yeah, it just, it just froze in the middle of whatever you were saying.

: Okay. It was yeah, it it was great. Okay. It was fantastic. Yeah. Uh I uh I was just going to comment off of uh River's comment of joining together if you're an online person in an online group because people understand you there versus when he tried to go to an in-person thing and they were sports focus and he didn't feel like he connected and he fit in. So if you're in a Twitch community and you're watching this, then you're going to join a Twitch community that's going to understand your likes, your dislikes, those kinds of things. In addition to uh the your struggle. So yeah, I thought that was a good point to make there. Yeah. Yeah. So good. Do we have to end?

: This has just been so awesome, man. It has been so good, man. This has been like the quickest three hours. I know. I know. It's I'm I'm I'm getting to that point where I was like, well, to begin with, I I don't know if I'd shared with you initially when I was starting is the thought was talk for two hours and then game for an hour. And I realized I can't actually make the gaming work while co-streaming. It doesn't work on my system. It's too much. I can't I can't manage it. It won't work. But uh do you have a game I should consider uh trying uh when I play games? I the only game that I play and consider is Risk.

: Okay. Online, which is based on the board game Risk. Yep. Which is such a good game. And it's on Steam for free. And so then there's a better chance that I will try it. So yes, it is definitely worth playing. Fortnite. Okay. Yes. Fortnite and Risk. Those are the only two that exist in my mind. Oh man, thank you so much for having me. I feel so honored that you would include me in this. Um and hopefully it was, you know, what you were hoping for. It it's what it's supposed to be. My my all I'm doing is bringing on friends who are on mission and we're talking about being on mission. So, it it doesn't matter what the conversation is because you're going to bring to my audience something that they haven't heard. Uh those that listen to the podcast, you're going to expose people that don't know, a hopeful disasters. Um so, they're going to go they're going to be able to go after, you know, a dozen episodes or more. I don't know what episode we're on, so I won't give a number to it. Um wait a minute. There are this many different organizations. Not everyone's in an organization, but half of you have been. You know, Hopeful Disasters, uh, GMBB, Taco, I mean, like, it goes, the list goes on and on and it's growing and it's not going to stop growing. The Holy Spirit's at work. People are feeling the call. Uh, people are searching and looking. And so, those of us who are trying to bring the light, God is bringing uh us or bringing them to us. And uh it's it's just amazing. So cool. Yeah, it's it's awesome. Keep going, man. Keep going strong. We'll be keep continually praying for you every day.

: Well, we do. You've already prayed for me. So, what can I pray for you? Uh as we close out and then we'll find someone to raise. Um, you know, I think the biggest thing for me is continual uh just continually being reminded uh of my need to not just serve this community, but make sure that um I am caring and elevating my wife and kids above. Yeah. Uh, in the digital space, it's easy for it to be a twenty-four-seven thing. Yes. Um, and I never want my kids to be a I want to invite them into missions. Um, that they would have a life devoted to to sharing the gospel and serving others. Um, but I uh, yeah, never want them to be a victim of ministry, you know.

: That's that's such a good a good thing to be reminded of. Um, yes. So, so let me let me pray for you hopeful disasters and uh and your family.

: Thank you God. I just thank you so much for uh my friend Wolfler and uh what you have been doing in his life to bring him to right where he is at this very moment to bring hopeful disasters to fruition and working into this season that they're at of growing community of breaking down barriers of finding freedom for people of of centering around prayer and stillness before you. So, I just pray for Hope Con that is upcoming that it will be refreshing for everyone who attends that you will open up doors of opportunity for people who don't even expect to be able to go to be able to attend. And even more than that, even though we're praying all the success for hopeful disasters because they are out there doing what you've called them to do. Uh we just want to pause and think about uh Wolfler's wife, Wiffler Wolfler, his kids who right now are young and excited. Daddies online and they they get excited about it, but as they grow, uh we don't want there ever to be a division between him serving and loving you and him serving his wife and serving his children as a father. Yeah. God, may there be no resentment there. May there be opportunities to invite them in. May they may they never be secondary to his call to be a father is secondary to his call to missions because we are to do missions in life. So he needs to be giving that example of being on life together with his kids included in all that he's doing online. So I just pray for guidance and wisdom and direction over all of that to bless uh his kids uh his wife his whole family as as he has taken that step out in faith to follow after you. God just pray this and ask your blessings in Jesus mighty name. Amen. Just love you, man. Amen.

: Love you too, buddy. What a joy. What a joy to get to be with you. Oh man, it's so much fun. Um, okay. Just uh big black guy. Uh, thanks for the stream as a man who uh God is guiding into overcoming lust. I appreciate your insights, especially have a blessed rest of the evening.

: Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Appreciate you. Praise God, man. Keep going. Okay. Keep going strong. So, all right. How do we how do we raid?

: So, you pull up your raid. I'll pull up my raid. You tell me who you want to go to so that I can uh support your community with somebody you would normally raid and bring my community over there to get to know them.

: Okay, let me let's see who's on Oh, I'm Oh, Pastor Don's going to be done in like a minute. Um Oh, John John's live.

: Oh, then let's go there. Yeah, John John. Okay. John John the Cool. Okay. Are there spaces in there? I don't remember how it's spelled.

: Uh no, no, no. Yeah, just John John the Cool. Just um Okay, got it. Just Yeah, exactly like that. Perfect, man. Awesome. Awesome. Let's go.

: I'm so excited. That's perfect. I didn't know he was going to be streaming. All right. Love you, buddy. So thankful for you, man. So thankful.

: Thank you everybody who was here. Everybody who's been here. You guys have been amazing and it's been an amazing amazing stream and we've made it through all the tech difficulties to the end of it and now we're going to go bless other people. We did it. Thank you, Lord. I got my raid started. Well, I think I did. Raid is started here. All right, raid is going.

: Hop into that raid. Go say hi to John John. Hang out with him. Love you all. We will see you all so soon. Take the rest of the day off.