When You're Broken, You Can Help Others

: Welcome in Raiders. Welcome in everybody. See how the sound is going here. Do we have a mic check? All right, that doesn't sound too bad at all to me.

: Let me see if I hear you. Testing one, two, one, two, one, two. Just got to wait on the delay for you. Hey, there we go.

: There we go. We have it. We have everybody in here where we've got six people coming over with the raid from the fish channel, which is, you know, kind of a unique thing that doesn't happen very often that I end up on three channels in the same day.

: But today is one of those days and I started out with my morning Bible study. Mel, good to see you in here.

: I started out with the Bible study and then I raided over to the fish cam and I do co-working over there and now we're raiding over here for the podcast.

: I like the separation of those because if you just want to hang out and you want to watch nature and creation, you can just go to one place and stay there the whole time.

: And if you're interested in the podcast, you can come hang out with me. And if you're interested in the Bible study, you go to another place.

: So I think that works well in that regard. Now, it doesn't make my numbers great. I mean, I could probably have a bigger community altogether, but I don't know if my attendance would be better if I switched that up.

: So, how about you, Donnie? How have things been going for you as far as being a content creator and streamer? It goes. One of the issues is I will say that I am very grateful for the community that I've gotten on Twitch and all the friends that I've gotten on Twitch.

: We, I was going through some rough times and it was literally streaming and Twitch that helped us, helped me and the wife get through, help me and the wife, you know, pay the bills and make ends meet.

: Unfortunately, now it was helping make ends meet, but it was still that was about it, if that makes any sense. Like looking for a new job, looking for a full-time job.

: I am working a full-time job now and unfortunately because of how much work I've been putting in with the full stream has taken a step back and it stinks. And this stream, but there are days when I get home from work because I'm working in a garage like, you know, with tires and wheels and all of that.

: I get home at like eight o'clock and have to drive like I need to take a shower and by the time I get out of shower it's like nine, maybe 9:30.

: I just don't feel like doing anything. Yeah. The thing that is fascinating that I don't know if you're not in the streaming realm that you may not know is there are seasons of things and seasons change, like with the seasons that literally are changing outside.

: Well, we're in the middle of summer in the northern hemisphere and in North America, we're out of school for the most part. So who's available, who's on, that changes. Their rhythms change.

: When we have time changes, that changes things internationally, who's watching, all of those things. If you have a part-time or full-time job, those change what's going on.

: If you have kids, I mean, like the life of streaming is one of those that has all kinds of influences on it.

: Even if you were a full-time streamer, it would still have all of those things. So, Donnie, why don't we just start? Let's just back up and talk about, and by the way, those that do not know Donnie Dreams, I don't know what you're not what you're doing with your life, but you need to be following Donnie Dreams.

: I love saying that. I love saying that like I don't know what you're doing with your life but you need to be.

: But I'm serious. I mean you are, I think, just one of those people that knowing you and the struggles you're going through, you're inspirational to watch your faith in God.

: And so I just want to back up and talk about how did you end up on Twitch? Not streaming, just on Twitch. And then what was the process decision leading you to be a streamer?

: And if that was separate from you being an intentionally Christian focused streamer, where was that change? So just tell us that story. Take as much time as you want.

: Do any side trails that you need to and I'll ask more follow-up questions as we get going. That is a long story.

: We have all the time we need to tell it on this podcast. So first off, my content creation journey didn't start with Twitch. My content creation journey, if we're going content creation, it goes all the way back to about 2012.

: I started a YouTube channel called The Modern Apostle. On that I was doing kind of apologetic work. It, I think I only did it for about three months, if that.

: It was like one video a week and it kind of blew up. In that little three months that I was doing it, I already had 150 follows, or 150 subscriptions.

: I got in contact with a couple of people about possibly doing like debates and that kind of thing. And then life happened.

: I lost what computer I did have and internet. You know, as I said, life happened. That's the best way that I can explain it.

: Now in hindsight, it's probably a good thing because at that point in time, I didn't have the knowledge of the scriptures that I do now.

: But fast forward a little bit, there was a situation where I would say I really started becoming a Christian.

: I had got into a car wreck, car got totaled. Lost my job. Ended up getting a divorce. A bunch of stuff. Lost my apartment, stayed with a friend, but he had a bed bug infestation.

: So I was waking up with like little bites and stuff all over me. I call this my trials a joke. And it culminated with me standing on the edge of a bridge getting ready to jump off and just being stopped.

: Now I know the naysayer or the unbeliever can say that it was self-preservation, that I have, I can't argue, but it was this small voice that stopped me in the middle of my tracks and said what would your kids think if you give up, if you end it here and now, what kind of role model, like what kind of example would you be setting when they have rough times?

: And they look for something, doing study of study. And Donnie, getting, I go ahead. I lost your audio there for a second if you can back up and retell that.

: Okay. Which part? You were talking about being an example to your kids and then I lost your audio after that. Okay.

: So if my kids were to look, you know, look for an example when they're going through hard times or rough times, if I would just end it, if I would have committed suicide on that bridge, what example would I have been making?

: And that just stopped me in my tracks. I pretty much said, all right, God, fine. I have made a mess of this life. I have nothing left.

: So I give it to you. Take this life and do with it what you will. I will say that might be a bad prayer to pray, that like that signs you up for the strongest warrior package.

: I will, that like that will sign you straight up for the strongest warrior package. I promise you that.

: But at that, like after that ended up happening, the guy that I was staying with, he did tattoos. He had a tattoo machine.

: I was studying the book of Job. And one of the things that stood out to me was Job 13:15.

: Though he slay me, yet will I trust him, and I will defend my ways unto his face. I ended up getting Job 13:15, though he slay me, tattooed on my left forearm.

: Shortly after this, I met my wife, the one and the only Mama Dreams. She's actually going to be coming down to reach with me.

: Oh, that's awesome. That's awesome, man. We've been together for over ten years. Like we've been married for over ten years now.

: I don't know why she sticks with me, but she does and I'm very grateful for it. I ended up moving up here. She was from a different town.

: We actually met online. Met on a dating app, but kind of hit things off. I moved up here. We joined a church.

: And we were, I was doing stuff in the church. I was teaching Sunday school and, you know, participating when I could, but I never really got into the inner click of the church, if you know what that means.

: I did that. I had made friends in the church and we'd play like we'd get together once a month and we'd play video games and like play D&D and that kind of stuff.

: And I was the DM. So I would paint many figures for the campaign. Every Wednesday that church had this thing called breaking bread where you get together for like a potluck and there are different themes on what to bring in and this is basically like fellowship and then we do Bible study afterwards.

: This was like late 2019. I want to say October 2019. And I had done some streaming on the side like I had come into Twitch.

: I popped up a couple of times. There was no, I thought about doing a Christian focused content, right? But mainly I was playing like Fallout, Fallout New Vegas, Fallout 76.

: It is basically just kind of just jumping on playing different games. At that point in time, my username was Dr. Strange Game.

: But in 2019, when during this breaking bread, I was looking through my phone looking at some of the minis I painted and another parishioner asked me, "Oh, what is that?"

: I told her, "Yeah, it was 1980s satanic panic all over again." She even went to the preacher, or the head pastor, and said something about somebody who is playing the quote unquote devil's game should not be teaching the children.

: That hurt. Yeah, because one of the people that I was playing the quote unquote devil's game with was the pastor's grandson. You know, I still consider him one of my friends.

: Well, I didn't know that part of it. I've heard this before. I didn't know the grandson was there playing with you, man. Wow. Yeah.

: Yeah. So the pastor probably knew then. Well, maybe not, but could have. Well, I mean, he knew. Yeah. But and I could be wrong.

: Yeah. I will admit I could be wrong. But I feel like he should have said something to the other person about, you know, casting stones, remove, you know, remove the plank from your own eye.

: Right. Right. But instead, it was literally shoved under the rug. What was discussed with me was, well, just don't mention anything about Dungeons and Dragons in church any. As I said, it was completely shoved under the rug, which hurt a lot.

: Yeah. And then COVID happened. The church shut down. So there was no like reconciliation there. There was no mediation there. It was just this and then no more church, right?

: I went through a period of backsliding. Yeah. A lot of backsliding. I was actually at the job that I was working at, one of my co-workers dealt in, um, the Mary Jane.

: Yeah. Or Devil's Grass or Marijuana or whatever you want to call it. And I actually ended up getting on that just because, you know, it was things were crazy.

: I was kind of looking for an escape. I was looking for a release and I got stuck on that. I was still streaming a little bit from time to time.

: I was doing YouTube videos under the Doctor Strange name, I think. And at that point in time, I was doing like Minecraft videos, Minecraft tutorials.

: I was doing like command block videos where I was making command blocks and maybe it was there, actually no, there is no maybe to it.

: It was literal marijuana induced paranoia. Oh yes, it'll do that. Yeah. Along with all of the stuff that was cropping up with the COVID vaccines and the fact that my history really with the Christian religion was almost solely based around the book of Revelation.

: I was born in Seventh Day Adventist and Jehovah Witness and that was kind of like my grandfather was a preacher for both Jehovah Witness and Seventh Day Adventist. And like all of this stuff going on with COVID vaccine and you know everybody talking about all of this, my mind went crazy. I went through a midlife crisis maybe.

: Yeah, well, you already had your, you know, trials of Job. So yeah, a midlife crisis after that of feeling on the road and now what do I do and where do I go next. Yeah, that makes sense.

: Um, and I think there was at one point in time during all of this that I called the head pastor of my former church and I literally said that I think I'm the antichrist.

: Oh yeah, it's like the mind was crazy. The mind, it was the combination of the marijuana induced paranoia. I've been diagnosed with bipolar disorder. I think I was going through a mixed mania episode. Um, so it was just a bunch of different things that like crammed in together with some paranoid schizophrenia and megalomania. It, as I said, it was bad.

: I changed the username on Twitch from, uh, at that point in time I think I had changed Donnie Dreams, but I changed it from Donny Dreams to just Donnie and I was just lurking a lot because I had found the Christian side of Twitch at that point. Okay, but I didn't want to interact. Ah yeah, because I was still in this phrase where I was dealing with my own sin. I was dealing with some, you know, other stuff. And I was ashamed.

: Yeah, I met Dr. Heels, met Aie. Okay, it was Fire Resistant that really, okay, yeah, yeah, it was Fire Resistant that really changed everything though because I was lurking in Fire Resistant stream. I started talking a little bit, not much, but I was lurking in Fire Resistant stream and Fred had said something about if you want a place to start reading the Bible, start in the Gospel of John. Read from John to Jude. Don't go into Revelation. Read from John to Jude. Okay, okay, and then once you've got that, then go back and start reading Genesis up to Revelation.

: And I did that. That was the period of deconstructing. I took everything that I knew, everything that I've been taught, everything that I remember, and I threw it out the window. It was just me in the Bible. Yeah, I read from John to Jude like I sat down at this point and I didn't have a job. I sat down and I read from John to Jude straight in like three days. It can be done. Yeah, I mean, I binged it and then then I started going back. I started reading Genesis and everything, everything just started falling into place.

: In Seventh Day Adventist, it's always talked about the work. It's always talk about, you know, making sure that you're doing the things that you're not eating the pork, that you're following the Ten Commandments, you know, the Sabbath and all of this other stuff. Well, even they put so much emphasis on, yeah, even outside of Seventh Day Adventist, a lot of Christian churches focus on sin management. They, they, yeah, you have to know your sins, manage your sins, get your sins under control, all of those kinds of things. So even if I'm just saying that might be your experience, but it's also a lot of people's experience regardless of if they were in the same group or not.

: Oh yeah, and like that's another thing is, you know, with the what happened with me at my other church, I started to realize there's a lot of fundamentalism. Yeah, but that's not the message that the Bible portrays. Exactly, yeah, it's and the things that stuck into my head was, you know, Paul saying is, "If it be of works, lest you, if anyone should boast, let it be me. I am of the tribe of Benjamin, of the stock of Israel. I was a Pharisee." And I have like I've done all of these things, but every single one of my righteous deeds are nothing but filthy rags as before the Lord.

: And yeah, at this point I'm still, I'm still wrestling with the sin. Yeah, it's getting easier to resist it, but I'm still kind of wrestling with it back and forth. I think it took me a couple of years to fully get off of that. It went from the actual, you, I live in the state of Indiana so we don't have stuff like the real stuff isn't legal here but uh, it went from doing that to grabbing the delta 8 that is legal that they're selling in the gas station and like going, um, but it was a back and forth journey but if I was beating myself up about me falling short, I would have never been able to fully overcome it.

: Yeah, the same with the corn addiction cuz I've dealt with that too. And it's, I realized that it is the person that's saying, you know, you failed, you messed up, you, you know, you aren't good enough. That's not God. That's the enemy because he wants, because the enemy is the one, the accuser of the brethren, Satan, the accuser of the brethren is the one who wants you to think that you cannot do it, that you are a failure, that you are doomed. He's the one that wants you to, and and alongside of that, that you're the only one struggling because everyone else looks like they've got it all together because that's what they're telling you. So exactly, so that I look good you feel bad because I don't admit my faults.

: Oh yeah, all of all of those levels. Uh, Supersonic was asking about fundamentalism and I'm just trying to, you know, uh, answer that, just it's a designation of people who are very strict in their Bible understanding like we're, yeah, that I think that's a good way to describe. I just wanted to throw that, see if you were good with that. Um, yeah, that's a really good way to describe it. Uh, they may not fully describe it that way, but uh, from what you were trying to describe, that's that's how they were approaching things. So yeah, it may be word for word, it might not automatically be that, uh, as far as a, a, you know, a literal understanding of everything.

: You know, there literally had to be a talking snake because it says the snake talked. You know, you don't have like they would probably be in those veins, but it's more about behavior and behavior modification than all the rest of how they understand scripture. And there are some wonderful people who uh approach things that way. But it's how do I interact with the my neighbor, my fellow Christian that I think is is where we're talking around those. So yeah, I would agree.

: And you know that brings into the idea since we're discussing it is that is literally what Jesus rebuked the Pharisees for. Yeah, is woe to you scribes, woe to you Pharisees. You know, you are a brood of vipers. And it's whitewashed tombs, but inside are nothing but decay and unfilthiness or decay and filthiness. It's because outwardly they have, you know, they appear to do all of these things, but inwardly they are nothing better than what we are. Yet they don't acknowledge them.

: Yeah, I the exact verse, but it's the it's the idea that, you know, there was a Pharisee and then there was a tax collector. Right, right, the Pharisee, it's like I do all of these things, I do all of this, but the tax collector, he doesn't even lift his eyes. He's sitting there just bow on his knees, head bowed, balling his eyes out and says, "Woe," ver I forget the exact term, the exact term of it, but it's like have mercy on me, Lord, for I am a sinner. Yeah, yeah, it that reminds me that passage reminds me of a friend of mine. I don't know if you know Pastor Brock VR. He was around for a while, at least he's not on Twitch right now, but he would talk about all the time like this, the prayer that you just say is uh, Lord Jesus, son of God, have mercy on me a sinner. Like that's it, like you just, you just repeat that because that's so true of all of us and you need to have that idea uh towards everyone else.

: So I didn't mean to get uh sidetracked on this uh you know side piece here of explaining that but I felt that was good for everyone listening. If you if you don't use those terms, you you may not uh understand those. But you were talking about the where you were moving forward in your faith and and finding those things. So uh Phantom, welcome in. Good to see you. Yeah, you miss seeing Brock online. I do too. I miss seeing him in person. He lived across town from me. Uh unfortunately, I can't see Chad. I'm on my phone. It's like that's the only internet I've got right now. So uh, if there's anybody in chat that I haven't said hi, what what's up? Uh, but that that's kind of what the deconstruction led me to. Yeah, because formerly, and I see this now, like looking back on it, I see this now. Formerly, I was, I was worried about how much I had sinned. I was trying to limit myself. I was in that phrase of sin management. Yep, and the fact that I was failing left me ashamed. Yeah, left me feeling guilty, left me feeling like I couldn't do it.

: And in the reconstructing journey, in reconstructing, I finally came to that realization of yes, I am a sinner, but I am a sinner that is saved by grace through faith. And will I ever be able to be perfect? I don't think I will. Because if I get to the point that I am looking at myself in perfection, then I am committing another sin called pride. It is I am supposed to humble myself. I am going to humble myself before the Lord.

: So this is kind of it was about this time that I start getting in with Christian Ninja and I start, you know, meeting up with the taco team and uh Christian Ninja was kind of talking, you'd said I had streamed before and he was the kind of the one that was starting to edge me back into streaming. Oh, I didn't know that. Yeah, it was Christian Ninja. Uh and I, I'm still, I'm still struggling a little bit. I'm still fighting with, you know, the shame and the guilt and, you know, I still have one crush that I am holding on to that's been very very difficult to kick. Um, and I've even had a couple people that have said something about the fact that I'm still doing it and that that's cigarettes. Mhm.

: But in the as I've reconstructed, I continue to study the Bible, continue to, you know, I I hate the fact that I've missed your streams. I love coming into your streams and listening to you go over stuff. Uh but it's now I see what Job 13:15 means. Though he slay me, yet will I trust him. My life has been saved through Jesus Christ. It is through the faith in Jesus Christ. That is the only hope that I have, right? And that is the hope that cannot be taken away from me.

: Even if somebody, you know, even let's say for instance, you know, I don't think it's going to happen anytime soon. Uh, a lot of people are talking about it with the way things are Israel are going, but uh, I don't think we're ready for it. But let's say the Antichrist does rise. There is a world government. Christians are persecuted. What's the worst they can do? They can take away my life. Yeah, but Paul says, "For me to live is Christ. To die is but gain." So they cannot take that hope away from me. They never can.

: So and I've had a couple of discussions about this is no matter what, like no matter what happens, and I I've come to this realization. This is this is what I hold on to. No matter what, no matter which situation, no matter what I find myself in, whether it be work, whether it be stream, whether it be, you know, talking to somebody on the side of the road, I am going to be, if they ask, ready to defend the hope that is in me through Jesus Christ. Yep, and if I am persecuted, if I am put in jail for being vocal about that faith, then I'll be tell I'll be explaining that faith to the guards just like Paul did.

: Yeah. Yeah. And Paul talks about how his suffering was an encouragement to others and gave them strength, which is what I was alluding to earlier is while you've had struggles, you're very open and honest about sharing those struggles and right where you are. This is where I am. Here's where I've been. There's where I hope to be. So, no matter like I just think that resonates with so many people in Twitch and online who are in the struggle.

: They feel like they're in the middle of a midlife crisis. They are in the middle of deconstructing because they've had church hurt. They're in the middle of their trials of Job. Wherever they are, whether they can put a finger on it, a label on it, it doesn't matter. They see you and that you are willing to say, "I still have hope." You know, that peace that surpasses understanding, that peace within you, that hey I'm holding on to my savior and it might not—let me not put a list of things together of here's the pluses and minuses of what's good and what's bad in my life right now because that's not going to weigh out and balance really well here. So let's not do that. Let's just hold on to the hope we have and focus on that one thing that we do have.

: Yeah. Suffering is exalting. That came in and there's a good conversation with suffering and supersonic just agreeing with you and talking about that suffering came in with a blessing and then just saying yeah, suffering is an exalting thing.

: Well, I guess that's where your name came from. You know, I think suffering—you've been here before maybe once or twice. I need to get to know you as well. This is one of the things, this is fun when new people show up, is like—and we've been doing some name dropping. Of course, nobody outside of the Twitch community knows these names we're dropping, but you're dropping names. I'm like, "Oh, yeah. I know them and I know them and they've been on the podcast. Ooh, I need to get them on the podcast." That's what's going through my mind as you're just talking about your journey and your connections with others. And I love this. This is so true. Other people are part of the body and they all give us something that we need. So, while Fire Resistant gave you a piece that you needed, Christian Ninja gave you another piece that you needed. For a time you were able to be in my stream and raid me. And now that is not in the season of what's happening. But in those moments, in those spaces, we do iron sharpens iron or we do encourage one another. We do lift up. We are walking alongside of.

: So I just continue to encourage you in your honesty about the struggle. And the other thing I'll say because some people will go the other direction or a couple of ways of—oh, you're just, you know, trauma dumping. No, I don't see that at all. Or, oh, you're just trying to glorify yourself. No, I don't see either of those. I see—I'm just saying if anybody listening feels that that's what happens with them, I just want to encourage them in a different way, like you are doing. No, you are pointing to God and his bringing you to the other side of the things that you have gone through and where you are right now.

: Yeah. Um, and that's pretty much—if there is one thing that I have brought to the equation, I mean I give all honor and glory to God. He is the author and finisher of everything. If there is one thing that I may have brought to the equation, I can still say I give it to God because he kind of made me this way. I'm just too stubborn. It's—I don't want—I don't want to ever—if anybody ever says that I'm trauma dumping, please forgive me. I never intend to trauma dump.

: Oh, I was and I wasn't meaning to imply you are. I'm just saying I have people that will come in the chat who will say things like you're sharing and then they will say I'm sorry, sorry for doing this. So I'm just trying to give a bigger picture here to other people who might be listening to the podcast.

: So gotcha. So yeah, um, I know with the suffering, one of my favorite verses and I've got so many of them like packed away now. I call it my cheat codes. There you go. If life is like a simulation, well, the Bible is the walkthrough. And if you really, really go down to it, when you're dealing with depression, when you're dealing with those kind of things, if you grab a few good verses and stick them in the back of your mind, it's kind of like the Konami code for life with suffering.

: James. And I love this because it's literally as easy as one, two, three, four. James 1:2, 3, and 4. Count it all joy, my brethren, when you face various trials, for you know the testing of your faith produces endurance. Let endurance have its way so that you may be mature and complete, lacking in nothing. It's literally one, two, three, four. And then I've gotten to a point that I think I can literally put Psalm 23 on my heart now.

: Yeah.

: And these are the things that I remind myself of when I start to get down, I start to get depressed, when the going gets hard. Because in my experience, the way I've seen it, when the going gets rough, when the going gets difficult, you have two options. You can either whine about it or you can do something.

: Yeah.

: And this may be where people would call me harsh, but I've spoken to a few people and I'm like, look, it is no use to sit there and pray to God asking for him to help when you're leaning on a shovel.

: Was that a sticker?

: Yeah. Yeah. I was like, "Yeah, gotcha." Like, there's been some stuff that I have been trying to do. Like, you know, I reached out to you for a little bit of help, but um, I'm looking to try to get a vehicle.

: Yeah.

: It was actually one of the things that I was doing today is, since I don't really have internet, can't really do anything else, I went down to car dealership here in town to look at a little 2008 Nissan Frontier. But even though their website and their hours say they're open, he's not going to be in the office until Wednesday. So, there goes that. Um, but in an effort to try to raise a little bit of money, I tried to do a streamathon. It didn't work. But, you know, it is what it is. It was worth a shot. Yeah. You know, I can't hear God to give me the money if I'm not willing to put in a little bit of work.

: Yeah. Yeah. So it's—I didn't go on and on and on about that. Well, why don't we back up to because you were talking about Christian Ninja encouraging you to jump in and do streaming again. So, when you did, what was your plan, your approach as you started doing that?

: Originally the plan and the approach was um, and it's still—my stream is still kind of geared that way. My stream is crazy. My stream is random. Um, my stream can go from a cozy stream where we're playing like little survival game to literal thunder and lightning and tornado sounds. That's what my raid alert is. But my when I first started it was the idea of creating content that if my kids would want some kind of encouragement, want something to learn, want something to watch, that I'd be able to get their attention. And it was kind of geared toward, you know, in fact, some cases I've literally put a sound alert just because my oldest son told me to do so.

: Okay.

: So I guess my content is still kind of geared toward the young adult audience. Yeah. Maybe like the seventeen, eighteen, nineteen, twenty. Yeah, right. I'd say seventeen through twenty-five. And that's kind of where it was for the longest time to help the prodigals and the parents of prodigals build bridges.

: But recently, probably within the last six months, I kind of taken a step back from this. It's like, this is kind of cool. It was the—I was sitting here thinking it's just like my story and what I've been through and what I've done and I've had like one outstanding prayer for about thirteen years now. Um, I have a little girl who I have never seen. Okay. Her name is actually Grace. And it's like it's always been—I believe it was Rascal Flatts and Torren Wells—they had a song "Until Grace Finds Me" and that was kind of to put it into perspective, that was kind of the fleece for me. It's you—Gideon holds out the fleeces. I am a man from a lowly family. I am not important at all. You know, nobody in my family's ever been really important. And that's kind of the way I've looked.

: Yeah.

: I'm not rich. I'm not special. I've never had anything. But, uh, I was thinking about the idea of the bridges and all of that. And I kind of changed it up. Now, the mission that I have on Twitch is to reach the lost, the lonely, the depressed, the downtrodden, the doubtful, the discouraged, and even the deconstructing because I've been there before. I've gone through it all. I've deconstructed my faith and I've reconstructed it from the ground up. If you have a question, I've probably had that question myself and I've probably dived into how to figure out an answer for it. And if anybody's willing to actually listen, you know, to lend an ear and not, you know, not just troll because it does happen, right?

: Right. It does. Yeah.

: It—I'm willing to answer the question and I'm willing to sit down and have a discussion. Every stream is an AMA. And that's the way I've done it is every stream is an AMA. We'll go and now we'll go from playing a game to talking about Bible verses. Lately I've been playing Car Mechanic Simulator. It's like an IRL mechanic playing Car Mechanic Simulator. So we'll go to talking about transmissions to talk about transfiguration.

: There you go.

: And just for those that don't know, AMA is ask me anything. So, uh, because there might be some listening that aren't fully in Twitch or just listen to the podcast later and they're like, "What? AMA? Is that like anime of some kind that I don't know?" Uh, oh, we talked anime, too, because I'm an anime geek.

: Oh, yeah.

: We'll get we'll come around to anime later because I want to talk about that. But just thinking about so we've talked about a lot of struggle. We've talked about the person you're trying to reach. Do you have a story or two where you have been able to do that? So we've talked about some people that have done that for you in some capacity. Do you have some stories where you have helped and reached other people?

: I do have a couple of stories. Um, oh, hang on. Hang on. There's an update in the channel. So, I don't know if you know Soaring Eagle. I'm guessing you probably do in ukulele stream. Okay. Didn't know if you knew the name. Update—if you'd been around for that. Now it's Soaring Eagle Isaiah 40:31.

: I didn't see that update before.

: It's like mom, she needed $350 copay for tomorrow's procedure. So, this is a prayer that we've been praying in the community. I told her how to get help. Your pastor gave me the 211 number. So if those people don't know, if you wherever you are in the United States you can dial 211 and it will tell you charities that are in the area and you can tell them what your need is and if there is a match they'll be able to help you with that. Then you also got a hold of a pastor's wife who was a friend and got the ball rolling. Not sure how mom got the funds but she has the $350 so don't know the full answer to how it got answered but through reaching out through connections, people got answers.

: You know what? I'm just—and I don't know. I've—there's a local church here, Donnie, that does help people with cars. You're in another state, so I don't know if it would work for you, but maybe there are churches in your area that maybe they have a ministry to help people get cars.

: To get back and forth to work. Possibly. I mean, we're doing all right. Me and the wife has actually figured something out. So we're getting by. And it's just the idea of I would love to get—yeah, yeah, yeah. And you shared before, those that don't know, you shared before you've been struggling with one car, getting both back and forth, both needing at the same time now that you have switched your employment schedule and she needs it for going to visit clients and all of those things. So it is a struggle. Um, we'll be all right until I think we'll be all right until beginning of the school year because she won't have to do anything.

: Yeah. Okay. School-wise until the beginning of the school year. So it'll give me some time to like look around to find something. I will say honestly right now I am being kind of picky. I don't just want a car. I want a small midsize truck. So yeah, benefit is—benefit is this job has given, this job has been a blessing.

: Yes. I've been working my butt off, but it's been a blessing because it's given me the means to do stuff that I haven't been able to do in a long time.

: Yeah. Uh, there is some plans to eventually use a little bit of—yeah, I may not be streaming as much, uh, but I'm planning some upgrades to stream. I'm already looking into smart lights. I'm already looking into Lumia. Uh, possibly maybe, um, if I could talk my wife into letting me, I am thinking about doing like a second channel.

: One of the things that's been talked about multiple times, um, is a turtle tank. Oh, yeah. Um, so I actually get—like, we've got a fish tank, but I want to specifically talk my wife into letting me get a tank with like one or two turtles.

: Have you? Because have you ever checked out Turtles and Chill? I think I have. I think I've seen it. I was just saying, is if she needs to understand conceptually what you're thinking, you know, you could go check out Turtles and Chill. And I think the last time I was there, they might have had a hundred people watching, uh, you know, right? And I'm like, man, that's kind of cool that just like, you know, watching creation is something that people enjoy doing.

: That's one reason I have the fish channel. But, um, my original stream scheme was Donatello from the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. And if I can find a way to do it without being like copyright infringement or anything, kind of like Jake Fox has with his, or Jake has with his fox.

: Yeah. I'm wanting to see if I can set up a little like AI or AI infused Master Splinter. Oh, oh, Master Splinter. I thought you were going to do a turtle.

: I thought you were going to do Donnie. Donn, Donnell. You know, there you go. That would work. Donnell is what I thought you were going with, but that that's still definitely in the like, that is still in the drawing board phases.

: Oh, that's super cool. See what happens. Yeah, you need to you need to have good internet. You need to have another rig. You need to—yeah, there's a whole bunch of things that go along with that. Uh, but we were talking about before I went and checked on chat, we were—I was asking you about a couple of stories of where you have been able to impact the lives of other people.

: Okay. So, um, before I get into that, there was one reason why I brought up the whole Gideon's fleece and the daughter that I've never met or never talked to. After that decision of like changing the focus with that new Ask Me Anything, right? Let's talk deconstructing. She, her mother actually got a hold of me.

: Um, and me and my daughter has actually been speaking. So that's like, that is—I feel like I personally feel like that was God saying this is the content that I want you to make.

: Right? So, uh, and now how have I helped people with that? There's been a few people that have come in, normally just in like a random raid or something like that, that they come in and I give that spiel, you know, my name is Donnie Dreams. You can call me Don. You can call me Donnie. Just don't call me late for dinner. I am a dad. I am a gamer. I am a geek. And you have been warned. I am one of those crazy Jesus freaks. We can start talking about Jesus at any time.

: My mission here on Twitch is to meet the lost, the lonely, the doubtful, the deconstructing, and all of this. And then it'll just cause people to ask questions.

: Yeah. And we've discussed, um, we've actually discussed one thing that's been big on social media lately, um, or it was—I don't think it is now. Everybody's talking about Israel, but I guarantee that's going to be a question that's going to pop up in chat next time I stream because everybody's talking about it. Bam. But we've discussed baptism. Is baptism necessary for salvation? Um, and I've delved into it. It's because of that discussion, because of that thing, is that actually caused me to dive into the writings of Augustine and the writings of some of the early church fathers. Is the consensus is it is a good thing. It was something that Jesus commanded. If you have the ability to do so, yes, do so. Is it necessary for salvation? Augustine said no.

: Augustine actually put it in a couple of different ways. He's got the baptism by water, which is what everybody talks about. Then you've also got baptism by blood.

: What is baptism by blood? Baptism by blood is martyrdom. If a person confesses Christ and they continue to confess Christ even in face of persecution and are killed because of that, then they have met the baptism requirement according to Augustine, which would cover the thief on the cross. Yes, yeah. There is also—well, the thief on the cross is a different, a different thing entirely with Augustine. And he—okay, I was thinking he's confessing and he dies. That's why I was thinking it would cover there. But well, uh, that would be dying because you confessed. That would be the baptism by blood. Okay, okay. The way Augustine addresses the thief on the cross and he puts this out specifically, or the thief on the cross was called baptism by desire.

: Whereas you have confessed faith in Christ and you would have a desire to do what he says, but because of his stenuous circumstances you aren't able to.

: Right? So this would be like deathbed confession. Mm-hmm. You know, a person confesses Christ on their deathbed, they're not able to take part of the sacraments. They're not able to take part of baptism. Augustine, according to his writings, would say that they have met baptism by desire. The thief on the cross because he died on the cross would have met that baptism by desire stance.

: And then there's the people that have come in that are legitimately wondering, legitimately questioning, that may have grown up in church that have done some deconstructing by themselves. Sometimes they'll ask questions, we'll get into the discussion, and then I may never see them again. Right? That's happened a few times. But then sometimes they'll join the Discord. Like, there's a gentleman in my Discord server that is—yeah, he said, "As I don't believe," but yeah, he's posting memes and he has been participating in the discussion a little bit. We'll continue to pray that somehow, someway, maybe he'll actually pick up the Bible. Yeah. Uh, and then there are some people I won't say names that are dealing with things.

: Yes. And they're asking for prayer. That's one of the things that I do have on my stream. It's a single channel point is a prayer request.

: Yeah. And I will stop and I will pray. Oh, I was just going to say, you know, the actually making it a redeemable thing, I think, is a great thing. I don't care what the points level are. I mean, I set mine at seven because seven is the number of totality. So, so, so I'm being creative with my stream if you know that.

: But seven, like you come in, you watch for five minutes, you got one point, you got seven points, you got whatever it is, you can absolutely do it. There is no cost. Uh, you don't have to do anything to earn those points to spend on it. But I think it makes it genuine on some level that people know that they can ask for prayer, not just you're saying it and nobody does it.

: Oh, you've taken the time to make it a redeemable thing, and I can do that and stop what is happening in the stream because prayer should happen because I need it.

: I love, I love that whole thing. I've even got it set up for an alert. So, oh, if the old school PlayStation—if you actually put "pray," like if you see "pray," it will sound like you kind of associate what you read with what you hear.

: Yeah. So when you click on it, it says PlayStation, but it sounds like you read "Pray Station" and it sounds like it says "Pray Station."

: Oh, oh, that's so funny. PlayStation. So, yeah, that's cool, man. But yeah, it's—and there are people that I continue to pray about. I am hoping, like, I know we do have this, the community as a whole, uh, has one—I would say miracle that we can all claim, and that is Miss Jada.

: Um, her leg is on the mend and she's—yeah, she's actually getting better. She's starting to walk again. She thought she was going to be losing her leg, but it never happened. And I will put that in the power of prayer. Um, for those that aren't fully familiar, can you kind of share a little bit more about that if you want to, about how long that's been, what's been going on?

: It's been—I think it's been going on for about a year now. Um, I don't want to give out too much because, you know, that would be a urge to go on.

: Yeah, I was just thinking the scope, like how long it's been going on and the seriousness. That's all I was. It's been going on for about a year. It was hit by a car. Doctor said that she may end up losing her leg, and the community has come together in prayer. I know it's not just me. Uh, I know that it's been everybody in the Taco Team. I believe a lot of people in the DC4C, which is myself, Black Cap, Dapper Pastor, that you, uh, as always, man.

: Um, the Gregs, Redeem J. Um, I think TC Warriors on there too. Taco, the Taco Team is myself, uh, the Quiz King, Samos 419, Ukulele for Worship, and Christian Ninja. I just—I know that a lot of people have been praying about it, and now we're seeing—now we're seeing fruition of it coming true.

: And I would say that would be a good segue into the other things I've learned over the years is prayer is not instant. It is not an instant thing. In some cases it can be, but I don't think we should expect it to be. Prayer is something that can take a while.

: Yeah. It is in that faith of persisting that the power of prayer is understood fully in my opinion. So yeah, there are so many different facets, uh, to prayer and praying. Uh, but you know, sometimes it's miraculous, sometimes it's through ordinary means, sometimes it's instantaneous, sometimes it takes years. Uh, you just don't know how and when things will be answered.

: Excuse me a second. Uh, but one of the things is being open about it on stream, talking about it continuously, going to God, and then talking about the answers to prayer. I think that's one thing that I think we do a poor job of is we might pray for the same person for a year, but we then—oh, here's the answer. We praise God for a week, and then we're done. It's remembering where have we seen God answer prayers again and again and again so that we remember he's with us always.

: Yeah, yeah. And I think that, I think that is a failure that I believe all of us face because I know I do it too. It's easy to ask God for favor in the hard times, and it's easy to forget to thank God for the good times. Mm-hmm.

: Because we get caught up in it. Yeah. Well, there certainly are enough times where in the Psalms or other places there's the whole retelling of the story of bringing out of slavery again and again and again.

: And maybe we don't, maybe we we have too narrow a definition of prayer sometimes of when I'm just talking to God. But remembering what God has done for you, recounting, giving praise, giving glory, giving thanksgiving, those are all acts of prayer as well.

: So whether they all happen together or they happen separate, those those are all still things that are that are ongoing. Ukulele says, "I noticed reading through the Old Testament that when they were facing a big battle, the leader would recite all the big things God had previously done." Yeah, that's what I was just thinking of too. Uh is the uh and in the New Testament too, there's the recounting of what God has done. And I think one of the funniest stories is in the New Testament when Peter gets let out of prison and he's knocking on the door and the the servant girl answers the door and says, "Peter's here." And they're like, "No, it's it's Peter's angel. Peter's not here. Let's go back to praying for for uh God to let Peter out of prison." And instead of, "Oh, wait a minute. That's an answer to prayer. So sometimes there's weird stuff that we don't get in the middle of prayer that like, hey, God's already answered it.

: You know, lift your head up and uh, you know, realize the answer is already already there among you. Um, but there's a Yeah, I we share prayers back and forth with others in the community. You you talked about that with whether you are in Taco or you're in DC4C or you're in the church digital. You find out about these or your reach conference. You find out by people going back and forth and and we do share prayers for one another. We do pray with and for one another. We continue to lift up. Uh right now uh looks like Soaring Eagle's got a storm that's uh coming through. So God just uh watch over Soaring Eagle. Surround with protection. Not only her but all who are in the wake of the storm that they are in a safe place that while destruction may happen that you spare lives and you just uh watch over and guide them and protect them in Jesus name. Amen. And boom. It can be that quick and it can be that simple. Um and we can be in agreement and like I said it doesn't always have to be the here's the request. I think the requests go on and on, but I think we need to give the praise on and on and on, which is why I like asking questions of, you know, where has God brought you to this place? What has God done in and through you on your stream? Uh, what's something that you didn't expect to experience uh as you started being a streamer? Something you had no idea this was going to happen for you as a streamer? Honestly, all of it. Um, last time I checked, we were over I last time I checked I was over 800 followers in car when like I'm streaming Car Mechanic Simulator. It's an older game. Um, and there's not many people playing it, but even that normally I have, you know, between 12 and 15 people in chat at the time.

: Um, I didn't expect to become a member of the taco team. I didn't expect to meet and to get to know all of the people that I have. These are people that honestly I consider friends like yourself, like Christian Ninja, like Blanco, like dare I say even Pastor Dustin, you know. Uh, and I can't I cannot wait until Reachcon to actually be able to meet him.

: Yeah. Yeah. I have a home church and I'm grateful for the home the home church that we have. The the pastor, he's cool. I love my pastor. But the congregation of Twitch, that is the congregation that I feel like I am part of. Yeah. It doesn't, you know, we're on the church digital, so it it doesn't follow the the the it doesn't follow the structure of a typical church. And we're not gonna be talking about the color of the carpet on the altar because there is none. But we serve a God who exists beyond space and time. And whether it be somebody watching from Florida, somebody watching from Michigan, somebody watching from Indiana, somebody watching from California. Jesus says, "Where two or three are gathered in my name, I am among them." And I believe that it is this movement of digital of a digital congregation of a digital fellowship that is breaking down barriers that were that the traditional church has never even be to consider. Whether it be love thy nerd that is going to conventions and reaching out to those people that may have never even heard of Jesus before or the only way that they've heard the Jesus Christ is in a curse word, right? Or if it be Reachcon, which is all of these people that have been streaming underneath the Christian tag that are finally actually coming together in physical fellowship and worship. It is a movement that I believe is building the kingdom in ways that we could have never imagined. And I am so grateful for every bit of it because I wouldn't have gotten to the place I w I am now. I wouldn't have been able to build my faith, like rebuild my faith brick by brick if it wasn't for this community. Yeah. And that's that's my sentimental I'm I'm crying, but that that that's my sentimental response.

: Oh, man. I love it. That is I I I got a couple of clips out of that. Um I never remembered to clip while I'm streaming. I need to get better at that. You know, there's always the the constantly learning thing, but the the emotional depths of what this is just shows that this isn't this isn't make believe. This this isn't uh imaginary. Uh you know, it was interesting you talked about earlier, which which the church has now decided online dating and meeting people and then getting married in real life in person is okay. That's actually a thing. But they still haven't figured out that meeting people online and building friendships is a real thing. And Donnie and I I know we're both planning on being there in in November for Reach Conference, but if something happens and one of us doesn't make it and and something happens and you and I never never are together in person, we have a real friendship. Uh you know, we we don't have the same kind of friendship that that goes and hangs out every Friday and does the exact same thing. You might have that with others online, but I I am constantly like I know about your life. I I know what's going on. And to me, that's what friends do. They know what's going on. And so, I share that with you. You share that with me. We are we are friends on mission together. We have we have several places of interaction uh an overlap and connection of community that just we're not alone in this. And uh so I I appreciate you sharing the fullness of that heart. So not only do you share the honesty of of where you are, but you you share the fullness of the emotion of of what it means to you. I appreciate that very much, friend. Yeah, sometimes I wear my heart on my sleeve. Then I wear sleeveless shirts. So I don't know what that means. It's a very small heart. It just goes right on the edge. It's gonna I don't know. That's always was a funny saying. Wear your heart on your sleeve. Okay. I Yeah. Where somebody can punch it. I don't know. Um Okay. Uh, I'm not sure where to follow up with that. Do you have any anything else that you would like to share that you've been that have just resonated or or popped in your mind as we've been having this conversation that we didn't go down that conversation yet? I honestly don't know. Okay. Oh, that's fine. And if you didn't have anything, I just thought I' I'd take a break a second and just try to see if there was something else cuz you've been just sharing some great stuff and I didn't want to lead in one direction if if you were, you know, feeling called to go in a different way. So, yeah. Yeah, I don't think I'm called to go in a different way. I think right now I'm just kind of along Hey, that's all good. I I enjoy this whole aspect of having friends on and just chatting with friends. And hey, whoever's here to listen in the conversation and if you bring something to chat, you get to join in. Uh if you're listening to the podcast later, it it's just two friends chatting about, hey, we're we're well, and I I'm going to speak for myself. I I'm just a weirdo on Twitch that's that's a pastor that that I'm I'm here and I mean I got a lot of hats so and I got a lot of fish. Like that's not normal. Um so also you know what what also feels really weird is um talking to a camera without somebody behind it. So a podcast is so much more fun because I get to see somebody across from me and have a conversation. So the fact that I on a regular basis sit and stare at myself on the screen and read stuff to have conversations with people is not the norm of anybody's life unless you are in a content creation of any kind. And so God can use people that don't fit in the box. He can he can use people that uh the world may not have hold of any high esteem or value. Uh yeah, but you know what? There's a lot of honesty and integrity with being open and following wherever God is leading you. Yeah. Um, one of the things that I I made the decision pretty much right off the bat, like when I first actually started streaming under the Christian tag, I didn't want to be I didn't want to be a persona. Ah, yes. I didn't want character. I wanted it to be raw. I wanted it to be honest. I wanted it to be what you see is what you get. I will say, yeah, I I've heard some streamers say is I come on here and I, you know, put all this energy, but then when I'm when I'm off stream, it's I'm just kind of blah. The me that you get on stream is going to be the me that you're going to get in get in real life. Uh I am I am blunt. I am sometimes to a fault. Uh I am I can get emotional. You know I I I'll blink back the tears. You know I try to be, you know, real men real men don't cry type thing. But, uh, I will say that's one of the one of that there's one part that I will not hesitate crying about is talking about, you know, talking about my God, what he's done for me because, yeah, anyway, I'm on a tangent there. But yeah, it's I made the decision that when I was on stream, it was me. It It's not a character. It's not a persona. It's not anything special. It is me. In some cases, I kind of do wonder like I I I struggle with the the VTuber aspect of things cuz, you know, I'll read the description and you know, it's they've got the Christian tag, but then they say that their their daddy was a space alien and it just it it doesn't compute. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. Um and I think that really that's that's what people are wanting more than anything is that no filler, no filter, raw honesty. It's a uniqueness and a because it it is unique like 100% everybody that is ever created is unique different than ukulele. You know, ukulele is different than Sonic and more than just one things. But it's the idea that people don't want characters because we're being fed characters all the time. Instead, they want that real in-your-face, almost brutal honesty and realism.

: Yeah, I don't know if it's contributed to my growth. Maybe it has, but you know, you talking about just being on fence, just being talking, just being a weirdo on Twitch all the time. Oh, well, and I think what part of what you're saying like really the authenticity of who you are and being yourself, uh, which you know, people like like I just had this happen. So, I I preached uh at a church in person yesterday and so I I posted a picture in a couple of Discord channels and said, "Hey, uh, just preaching today and and a couple people go, "Hey, I didn't recognize you." Uh, it's like, "Yeah, that's not uncommon." I mean, I've had this since I've been a pastor. Like, Sunday you don't have my glasses on. Uh, well, my public supply, I probably do wear it, but I'll wear contacts. No, no hat. And then people don't recognize me. If if I'm out of town and people know who I am and they see me during the week, they see me on Sunday, I'm a different person.

: And people that only come to church once a week and only see me without a hat, without glasses see me in town during week, they don't recognize me. I look entirely different. I don't think I look that different. I don't know why you can't recognize me. But it's kind of like we all poke fun of the Superman glasses. Like, why can't everybody see that he's Clark Kent and Superman? It's so obvious to everybody. But when it's somebody that we know, we can overlook some of those things of authenticity or we can hide the authenticity really easily and have that happen.

: Um, I'm having a so a couple of people have addressed this having a few buffering issues. Um, and that seems to be my stream is unstable, not you. So anybody watching this later, if all of a sudden the picture is blurry, uh, I don't know if that's something in my area, my internet. Uh, I don't have anything else running. I turn my stream off. So unable to tell you what that is. So hopefully the audio was good. So we'll at least have that all the way through. Although we had a few hiccups earlier with the audio. So hey, it's streaming. It's what happens. Technical difficulties. Yes. Here's another thing. It sounds cliche. Sometimes it takes technical difficulties maybe the enemy's way of trying to see some things to be said. Don't think that's ever. Yeah. Well, yeah, that's another. Yeah, the things that overall to make it happen. Certainly uh let you wonder sometimes when those things happen. Uh are things getting in the way? Uh is there a plan there? I don't know. I don't want to give the enemy that much credit. I don't think he's that brilliant. But but I do think that even if that is it, our faithfulness I will use it no matter the outcome. Uh I that's where you know I was like hey do we need to reschedule and it's like a matter of hey this is the first time it's worked in your schedule to get together and make podcast. So I was like I don't want to miss the opportunity. If we can make it happen let's make it happen. Uh because you are now working full-time. You you do have some time off. So hey let's let's jump in. Let's make this happen. Uh we'll do it on the phone. Now my internet's having problems. Um, so you know, we'll we'll make the best of it and enjoy it and not try to cover it up, not cut it out of the, you know, the episodes later and just skip past it like nothing happened. We'll just acknowledge it and uh recognize it and say, "God will use it." So, I do want to talk about you said you love anime and and you were doing I thought I thought some fantastic stuff with that.

: I do not have a background in watching anime. Uh, I don't have an overabundance of knowledge of anime and and how I mean I know what it is and I but I'm not a known characters. I'm not going to know very many shows that are that going to fall underneath it. And of course, there's a wide range of what people include and don't include in there, but you were putting together a series to help. And when I was watching those videos, it really made me interested in watching anime. Uh, so just wondering if you could talk about what you were doing there and let other people know where they can find what you're doing with anime.

: So anime is the YouTube is YouTube. I if I'm on social media obviously you should be able to find me on just about you should be able to find on Tik Tok on YouTube Instagram is the only thing that's a little bit so that's kind of like I think keep it simple for somebody should be able to find the on YouTube what the idea was I wanted to do. That's what I call animating the game. So the idea was to take various story arcs or characters or episodes and turn it into how we can use from the anime to understand the latest was the origin of ter. So like foundation before this was one of actually secret end of power unlocked a new mode called ultra instant and the idea of last episode which they had some copyright claim videos I think it because of that but imagine taking back which is one of the classic enemies mixing it with the teachings of Toer. Yeah. To get a black going spiritually instinct and that goes into a lot of what we were talking today. Yeah.

: 136 shall be my salvation. Proverbs 36. It's the idea that the human go to is to worry. Human the human status wants to make sure that all of the things are counted everything all the tees are crossed all the eyes are possibly worry things but Jesus says don't worry don't worry about what you will eat because look at the spirits they they neither nor takes care of them the legs of the field they never we phrase they use there but even Solomon all of his was not raised such as these but they give or take and cast them to the We get caught up in all the details. We get all these things in me. I'll take it. Yeah. Our minds are living in we because we're thinking of the short term instead of longer. That's kind of what the whole spiritual thing was. That's what what it was trying to be is, as I said, it was taking something that was very popular in anime and turning it into something that we could expound on teaching.

: Yeah. I really I really love that whole concept there. You're taking a story from anime and you're finding a place that it connects with in scripture and you're bringing the person who's a fan of anime to a pointing to scripture and saying, "Hey, that story over here, it's very similar to the story over here. That story over there is similar here." Uh they're not exactly the same, and then you point out where they differ or the new nuance levels of things are. Uh, so if anybody knows a person who loves anime, I think you're absolutely going to enjoy uh what Donnie is doing and you do put a lot of work into this. How long does it take to make one of those videos that you're doing? Well, that's usually normally at least. Okay. Week building up script to getting script editing script that includes research into scripture watching then recording audio and pieces for use discussion streams for contest or something stream and then me and put a little desk set up so it looks like my desk and interviews and stuff. So, I've been thinking about doing social content about two hours, but it would be like 9 to maybe 11 p.m. figure out who would be able to win. Well, you got a number of West Coasters who absolutely could could jump in or or maybe some early morning uh over in Australia or New Zealand depending on you know other side of the globe might be able to because uh that would be closer to if you're 9 to 11 Philippines that would be 9 to 11 um for part of the time you know so it would be close to it. If you go the the go west le of yourself, you'll be able to get people. East of Europe, probably not much, but hey, you never know.