Best Practices for Life and Relationships in Digital Spaces

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Healthy discussion, prayer and spiritual formation using mediated technology.

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There is no complete substitute for relationships in real spaces. We are ultimately made for proximity and for touch. Yet, we live in a unique moment in time that allows for connection to family and friends that can be a rich and meaningful gift. And in a time of social distancing, digital space is a wonderful tool.

Powerful, meaningful and satisfying relationships can happen using a variety of video tools. We have to remember, however, that sharing digital space is NOT the same as sharing the same physical space. To use these tools well, you all will need to be deliberate. We all need to moderate ourselves a bit – adjust how we might normally engage conversation as a gift to others. This adjustment is a gift of love and care to your community, and ultimately a gift for yourself.

Digitally mediated relationships can be fantastic, but you will need to be purposeful. Here are some things to consider as you engage digitally:

FOCUS YOUR ATTENTION

Lack of focus is biggest mistakes I see is that when people are in a digital meeting or conversation. People feel alone and so they do things they would not normally do in a physically live conversation. People get up and move around, go for walks, get something from the refrigerator, let the dog out and even go to the bathroom!!!

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Assume everyone on the call can see and hear everything you do.

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It is not that you are never interrupted in live conversation, but these things are particularly disruptive on video. Digital relationships require a bit more focus.

Your digital meeting will foster healthy relationship as you give appropriate attention. Put your phone away. Don’t text others. Don’t be typing or doing other work. You would not do that in a live meeting – so honor people in digital spaces the same way.

MANAGE YOUR PERSONAL SPACE

You will love and care for others well, if you give attention to the space you will be in before your digital conversation. Here are some things to consider:

DIGITAL CONVERSATION

Video conversation can be really satisfying, fostering deep connection and relationship. It can also be very frustrating if people use the same conversation practices they use in live environments. Adjustments need to be made. Here are some suggestions:

TECHNOLOGY TIPS

There are a few basic guidelines that will help digital conversation happen more easily.

PRAYING IN DIGITAL SPACE

Prayer in digital space can been deeply meaningful. Many of the practices that foster good conversation will also foster meaningful prayer.

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Each in Turn:

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This is a good place to start. Consider praying for people in turn. Each person can share (with a suggested time frame) and then one person in the group can pray for that person. Sometimes spontaneous prayer can be challenging as the technology and lag may make people feel like they are interrupting others. (Review the tips for conversation in digital space).

Once you have become more comfortable with the tools, the use of pauses and pace, other forms of prayer are certainly possible. Ultimately any kind of prayer you can do in live space can be done in digital space. And a good rule of thumb is to remember that if you would not do something in live space, it will probably not work in digital space.

BIBLE DISCUSSION IN DIGITAL SPACE

Good facilitation skills are important no matter what the venue. A discussion is often as good as the facilitator. Digitally mediated discussion requires a bit of extra care and planning, but it is very similar to facilitating discussion in live space. Here are some things to consider in digital space.